I am so very sorry for your loss. I'm glad that even though you don't feel ready to join a support group that you did reach out to this forum. Hopefully you will find other sources for comfort and encouragement when the time is right.
I think I know what you are saying about your husband not being able to fully understand your level a grief. It is different for a woman because you had been carrying your child in your womb for all these months and that does compound the emptiness and grief you feel.
One word of advice, though: don't underestimate the grief your husband is experiencing. Although he won't experience it the same way you do, perhaps it is fair to say that you may not have a full sense on his grief either. Think about it this way, perhaps his grief is different because he was unable to as completely bond with your unborn child the way you could. Maybe he is even a little jealous because you and the child did share that bond.
I would strongly encourage you to talk with one another and share your feelings about your grief. You are both grieving. You both lost a child and being individuals you will experience that loss uniquely. This will be a test of your marriage to be sure, so share it together and let your love be proven enduring and strong.
Last year, I was half-way through my first pregnancy when we lost our daughter. It really is painful to lose a child that is so close to being in your arms. I feel your grief, but it really brought my husband and I closer to each other. I also debated trying again soon after, but now that this year has past I am glad we waited. I have made peace with our loss although I will always miss her. We look forward to trying again within the next couple of years (I graduate this semester & hope to find a good job with benefits so my husband can stay home with the kids).
Dec 18th 2009 my wife had felt little movement and through the 20th. On the morning of the 20th I said to her lets go get checked out just to be sure that everything was okay (he was at 37 1/2 weeks). After several doctors and nurses visited with us we were finally told that our son Jacob had gone home to be with the Lord. Well I can’t even begin to describe the different levels of emotions that we both went through. I’m sure those in the post can understand. What we have found that even though the devastation of it all was overwhelming, our relationship became closer and we actually feel like we are one. I will never understand it fully what my wife went through. I do my best to humble myself and put her on a pedestal everyday. We just recently started trying again and we think she is pregnant. I would not recommend this every couple starting so soon after, but for us it was putting faith in God that led us to the decision to try again. We have leaned on our faith in God to overcome all obstacles. My prayers go out to all. May God keep you.
Last edited by inchrist6; 05-26-2010 at 01:25 PM.
Reason: change wording