I just don't want to play with Roman today.
Every week day, we have the same routine. Get up, diaper change, milk, play, oatmeal, play, yogurt, play, fruit, nap, milk, play, vegetables, play, then Dad gets home and takes over all the playing parts for the evening.
And today...I just don't want to. I want to read a book, or stare into space, or whatever. I'm just not in the mood to play.
Roman is perfectly content to play alone, I just hate that, it makes me feel so guilty like I'm neglecting him.
I have some of those Baby Einstein DVDs for him, his favorite is the nursery rhymes one, and he would gladly sit for a half hour and watch that. (his favorite song is the alphabet song, which delights me to no end)
So anyway, the point is, is it entirely awful of me to just not feel like playing with my son today? And would it be the worst most neglectful thing I ever did if I just let him play by himself and watch nursery rhymes while I sat on the couch next to him and read a book?
I can't speak for everyone but I have those days too! Sometimes, I just don't want to play. I just want to get lost in my thoughts or in a book.. not too lost though. lol.
But, I say, go ahead. Read a book, relax, stare into space. In a bit, I'm sure he'll give you a huge smile and you'll be so taken back that you'll start playing with him anyway. =)
"Sometimes, instead of reading a really good inspiring book, I want to be the book." by me, Bevin
Nothing wrong with sitting down with a book while he entertains himself, and there's nothing wrong with you wanting to escape into a book for a little while either. Its good for him to learn to do his own thing. Not like you're putting him in a room alone while you go somewhere; you'll be sitting right there on the couch near him. Enjoy a little escapism, we all need it now and again.
And you aren't neglecting him, that's just pish posh.
Just to point out - would you feel guilty if you put him in front of his favorite DVD so you could do housework or some other chore? Probably not. I hate it that I feel guilty when I want to do something for myself but not when I need to get laundry done or clean the kitchen. Just not fair.
Just an observation.
Oh please girl, lol. Read the book. You need some time to do adult things too. Its ok really. All the more reason to get that sitter You will feel refreshed when you get home and you'll be ready to play! Oh and I think its healthy for kids to play by themselves sometimes. It teaches independence and creative thinking. Dont feel guilty. We all have those days. I work all day and am usually soo excited to go home and play with my daughter but I do have those days when I get home and Im just blah. So ill put on a movie or something and ill sit with her and she is just as happy and it gives me a little break.
Changing diapers are the highlight of my day! lol
Don't feel bad if he is content, he's fine. My dd has always been great playing by herself. She still does. She could sit at the kitchen table drawing and writing for hours.
Parenting is like that show "Survivor"....."outwit, outplay, outlast."
Proud mama of 3 hornswaggling scalliwags.
ra11en - Its true, if I'm doing something "productive," its completely different. But because I want to just do NOTHING at all, I feel like a bad mother.
I just hate those parents out there that never pay any attention to their kid. I know a girl whose daughter was walking by six months old because she put the kid on a blanket ALL day EVERY day and just left her there to fend for her herself with a bottle next to her. I don't want to be like that.
I'm probably being extreme and irrational, but I just feel like its what I'm supposed to do as a mother, play with him and spend time with him at every possible opportunity. Even though I know HE doesn't mind being on his own, *I* mind.
PS - I think its just the fact that every day is the same. I know exactly how our days are going to go before they happen. Want to know what we'll be doing at 11:03am next Tuesday? I can tell you. Its always the same.
I'm just a little bored with it, I want to do what *I* want to do for a change. Just for a little bit, just for one day.
Do you guys know what I mean, or am I crazy?
What you are feeling is completely normal, I think all moms feel that way sometimes, I know I do. Don't feel bad or guilty for wanting some "me" time, you deserve it and are still a great mommy.
I know what you mean - especially about the routine and the guilt. Like you, our days are all pretty much the same, even when we do errands they always get done at the same time. I find myself feeling guilty that I look forward to bedtime every day. It's not that I don't enjoy spending all my time with my son, but I can't help feel a little relieved when I put him in the crib and know I will be able to sit without someone crawling into my lap or have a drink without the cup being grabbed from my hands.