Ok so I was told while I was pregnant the best thing I could do is set a bed time and stick with it. Use the "cry it out" method and eventually it will run like clock work. So when he was 3 months old we did just that and it worked perfectly. He would go right to sleep or lay in his bed until he did. At the beginning of June he had an earache in both ears and had one again 2 weeks ago. Since then he will not soothe himself to sleep. I feel horrible for saying this but I let him cry for more than hour and eventually had to let him sleep with me just so I could get sleep. I don't want this to become a habit of him sleeping with one of us but we are exhausted and can't think of anything else to do. "Crying it out" doesn't work!! He will cry and cry and cry! What can I do?
Also, I should add that we recently took away his pacifier (during his first round of earaches) and I know what your thinking...there's your problem but it's not. Even when we were letting him use his pacifier he spit it out when he fell asleep and never used it again until the morning. It was like it was only something he used when he was bored. He was never addicted to it or just had to have it.
Is he teething?
Try orajel and/or tylenol before bed.
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Oh mama. hugs. Everyone gave me the CIO advice with dd and I let her do it once. Never again. I'm guessing your babe actually slept when you had him in bed with you. I sleep with my babies. We are biologically designed to sleep with our young. However, not everyone wants to sleep with their babes, and that's okay too. Have you tried The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley? It has gentle suggestions on how to help your lo sleep. Another thought is you can move his crib alongside your bed so that you are close, but not in the same sleep space.
It is possible as H. Starr said, that your babe is teething (we are currently experiencing this-fun!). Your babe might also be having ear infection problems. I know several babes that have tubes because of chronic ear infections.
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Thank you both. I have been giving him the tylenol as needed and that hasn't helped. But I haven't tried the other yet. Definitely will! He has no problem sleeping with us but I just don't want that to begin a habit. Also he is on an antibiotic for an ear infections in both ears now. So maybe that is what it is....who knows?!?! Thank you both for suggestions and encouragement. I was afraid I was doing something wrong....
My son went through a similar phase when he was nine months, and I've heard other people say their babies had sleeping changes around nine months as well. I think alot has to do with increasing separation anxiety, they really understand when they wake up that they are in the dark without mommy. With my son, it was also that he was learning to pull up and wanted to practice all the time and would wake himself pulling up on the crib rail. If he is sleeping fine with you, it sounds less like pain from ears or teeth (although that could certainly contribute to him waking more frequently) and more like he wants to be where mommy is. I never did CIO with my son - but I was adament about not taking him out of the crib. I would go in and rub his back, stroke his hair, but kept him in his crib (unless he was very upset, in which case I would pick him up and let him calm down, and then put him back in). There were nights that it took a very long time to get him back to sleep, but it got better and he was back to his regular sleeping habits soon. I hope you find something that works for you soon!
Yeah... from what I'm learning there are certain phases babies go through at 4months, 6months, and 9 months where their sleeping can go down the drain (currently living through the 6 month phase myself).
I hate to say this... but... it will pass (Heather can beat me with a Boppy pillow for saying that ) I'm almost at 2 months with no sleep. Tried everything, nothing works, waiting it out and trying not to get into any bad habits.
The thing is, sleep changes all the time, even in adults, so in babies just the littlest thing can totally throw them off. I guess some babies take it in stride, doesn't effect them too much, some go out of whack completely. At 4, 6 and 9 months (give or take) they go through growth spurts which of course cause muscle pain. Also these are big developmental times for babies. And of course... teething.
Some people make you think CIO will 'fix' the problem and never again do you have a problem. They're wrong. Any sleep method is only to set a foundation, but not and end all be all guarentee to make your baby sleep perfectly forever. They're just meant to give the baby the basics to get back on track when something throws them off. But these periods can last awhile.
Right now my baby boy is teething, growth spurt, learning to crawl, trying to learn to pull himself up. And babies do all these things in their sleep! He's actually trying to crawl in his sleep which is waking him up. I just found all this out over the past couple of days... and I'm hoping he settles down and learns these skills soon so I can get some sleep!
I know it's not much help, but after trying everything under the sun, nothing is fixing his sleep... so... just gotta grin and bear it.
John-Gabriel Richard~ Born 12-14-2008
Lucas Michael- Born 07-16-2010
Why don't you want him to get in the habit of sleeping with you? It's perfectly normal, and safe and it sounds like it works for you. Here's some more information on it:
Before trying CIO, you should read the research proving the harm it does to babies. Here's a list of some of it:
My baby sleeps with me, and we both get plenty of rest.