Spanking, to be or not to be??

[Melindakcc]

I do not know how some of you moms feel but I do believe that spanking should be apart of disapline. I mean being angry when spanking is a no no and also when the infraction is minor. But I know some moms feel that spanking is to harsh and not justafiable. Believe you me, I do time outs, talking, and when the punishment comes to a few swats on the rear, I explain to Hailie what she did and why mommy is spanking. So moms what are your feelings on this very sensitive topic???

[Disco Lemonade]

Sensitive topic…right you are, so sensitive that this might not be a good topic to discuss. Some are not open to “opinions” here. Some will criticize you for swatting your child on the butt. This place is just not what it used to be. The spanking topic is very similar to the breast feeding topic here. It always starts some sort of chaos.

As for MY opinion on “spanking,” I do not consider it horrible as long as your child comprehends on why he/she got a whack on the butt. There is nothing wrong with a little tap on the butt, but if there is hair pulling and belts are being bought out, then “I” consider that to be abuse.

[SiMaMa]

I think spankings should be a part of discipline, but not the only part. It seems that now a days things that our parents did to us are considered crimes. I have three much older siblings, two of which have children. They never spanked, are their children are hellions. Now all in their teens, the older two have respect and drug problems, not to mention are completely irresponsible. I don't think that the lack of spankings were the only problem, but it could very well be part of it. Growing up, my nephews had no fear(or respect) for their mother, because they knew that there weren't going to be any severe consequences. Time outs were the only form of punishment, and to be sent to their room with all their toys didn't really phase them.

My mother spanked me when I was bad, and I have nothing but the utmost respect and love for her. And even now, in my 20s, I would never dare say a stray word to her because I know she would surely smack me upside my head. I think that as long as you aren't abusing your children, spankings are ok, and I plan to implement on my son when he is a little older. Even now, after small pops on his legs when he bites, he has almost completely stopped biting.

[moonemaiden]

Spanking is rare in my household. For the most part I don't believe that "hitting" children is a good way to teach them not to be violent. On the other hand, there's a difference between a swift spank on the rear end and actually hitting a child. With my daughter we have developed an order of discipline. First offense, we sit down and discuss the situation trying to make sure that she understands why it's not acceptable behavior. After that she only gets one warning. If she continues that behavior various other discipline methods are used. Time out, extra chores, revoked privileges, etc. There are times when this doesn't work, or when it is an extreme safety issue and she needs to understand the importance of listening immediately that I will resort to spanking.

However, I get the feeling my son will be an entirely different type of child and I will have to develop a completely different method for him. The major thing I try to remember is that discipline means to teach not to punish.

[KayLady]

I'm with you ruth, my mom spanked me (dad didn't) and out of it grew only resentment from me, not respect. I'm not against spanking altogether (unless it's abusive, as Disco mentioned), but I do believe different forms of discipline work for different children and each individual needs to be taken into account. We tried spanking with our daughter and it just did not work for her, so we stopped. We never resort to it now since we know it doesn't work for her, what's the point? Time outs are what really work for her, they get her immediate compliance and we hardly have to go there anymore.
Some kids, however, simply don't respond to time outs and some behavior deserves a spanking. I believe that a swat on the bottom, just enough to shock, is justified for toddlers when they are going to do something (or just did something) that could hurt themselves or someone else. Regardless of the form of discipline, children are always going to act up, it's how far they go that tells you what is working.

[lismom2]

Not a spanking fan.

[H.Starr]

My son is about to be 10 months old. Far too young for spanking.
However, when he is older, I can guarantee that he and his future siblings will end up getting their butt smacked from time to time.
Like someone else said, it definitely won't be the only form of discipline, nor will it be a daily thing, but from time to time.
Also, "A" butt SMACK. Not a beating. No belts, tree branches, 2x4s, or other crazy things. One hand, one butt, one smack.

Now, a side note: I was in line at the store the other day and was aimlessly glancing at the covers of all the tabloids. Tell me why Kate spanking her daughter was big enough news to take up the whole cover of one of the magazines?!?!
First of all, leave those people alone already (in my opinion, them doing the show is what ruined their marriage), and second of all, Do I care if she spanks her kids?!?! People spank their kids every day, it doesn't make the cover of a magazine.
I just thought it was obnoxious...

[jenn_0629]

I think parent's that spank misconstrue fear for respect. Why would you respect someone that hurts you? I didn't respect my parent's for it. I think that you can use other methods of punishment to get through to your children. I think it's abuse because it is the intention of hurting your child. That's just my opinion.

And about the Kate thing, they are the poster people of parents. Anything involving there children that is negative will be all over the place, it's what they signed up for when the entered the show business industry.

[Bec caV]

Spanking has it's place, I will say that. Of course that's when the behavior of the child is absolutely horrible, and of course hand on the butt once... it's more of a to get his/her attention action. And of course never spank as punishment for hitting someone!

There is also an age you have to stop, in my opinion. I'd say spank no later than about 5 years old, after that it's not going to do much good. After that point, there's more effective means of punishment that don't involve spanking.
We were spanked up until about 5 years old, then my parents moved on to time outs (though we didn't call them time outs then). For serious matters we got things taken away from us like TV time or if mom had been planning a special outing or something she'd cancel it, or no snack before bed.

[charliesmommy]

I didn't get spanked very often but I did for serisously misbehaving. I also got my mouth washed out with soap. I plan to use the same tactics my mother did.


I don't remember one spanking but know I got a few. I do, however remember eating soap as well as the words I used causing me to have to eat the soap. To this day I do not use those words because even the thought of them brings the taste of Zest to my mouth. Blah!!