DSD keeps stealing, what to do?
This is my first post here so please bear with me....Quick intro-
DSD-13 (lives with mom)
Yeah you read that right. There are 7 girls between us. DH has custody of his 2 youngest, their mother spends more time in rehab and jail than she does out and she hasn't seen her children in almost a year and a half. Usually everyone gets along well, some bickering and what not that is usual, but this latest turn of events has me perplexed as to what to do.
The 8 yo DSD apparently will take off with anything that isn't nailed down. When DH and I first started dating his mom told me about DSD taking some gum from a store one time. She was about 2 or 3 at the time, they made her take it back inside, and punished her for it. I didn't think much of it. A few months ago, 4 of our daughters picked up a piece of a toy from Walmart and took it out of the store with them. This DSD in question is the one who finally blew the whistle on the other 3. This earned them a trip to the police department to discuss stealing with the police sargeant, having to write 500 sentences of " I will not steal", writing letters of apology to the manager of Walmart and returning the toy, plus grounding from everything but breathing for 2 weeks.
This week, the 3 DSD's are in Florida with the inlaws. I was doing laundry and asked my 2 youngest to put up the 2 younger DSD's clothes since they weren't there. The 9 yo had about 10 tubes of chapstick in her top drawer. My 2 start saying that the youngest gave it to her. I opened the youngests drawer and there is chapstick, 5 $1 bills, and a ring. The ring was mine, and I remembered my mom asking the kids if they had seen some ones she left laying on the table earlier that week. I asked my mom how many she was missing she said 5 or 6. My sister said that everytime we are there something comes up missing from her room also. I had asked the youngest to take my wedding rings and put them in my jewelry box a while back while I was doing chores. The ring that came up missing was just a piece of costume jewelry I bought as a souvenier a long time ago, but it was mine and was in my jewelry box. The kids start telling me about all this stuff DSD has brought home from school that friends "gave" her including jewelry, money, candy, perfume, chapstick and the like.... but of course school is out now so I can't investigate that route further. DSD isn't due home until next weekend, and I need a plan for discipline for when she gets home. DH is a strict disciplinarian and says " spank her till she can't sit down" and be done with that. While I am not totaly opposed to spanking, I have popped her before for other infractions and she pitches such a fit that I dont feel its the best way to deal with her. Its not making a long enough lasting impression. This has obviously been going on for quite some time but we just now caught on to it, and I would like suggestions on how to deal with it. Thanks!
DSD-13 (lives with mom)
DSD- 9 (lives with us)
DSD- 8 (lives with us)