help with behavior at school.

[dsantorejr]

My 7 year old son is extremely bright and does wel in school, but has a problem experessing himself at school. he will have episodes where he throws things, or hits a child and does not listen to the teacher and tries to run away. This is kind of simplyfying it. He has trouble sharing feelings and seems to have a deliberate sense of right and wrong. It seems to be a self control issue. But at home or haning out with friends at church is never(or hardly ever) a problem and never to the extreme it is at school. The Principal had him suspended for a week now and he has to go to a different school for a week. My wife and I are at the end of our rope. We pray about it and talk to him about it, but nothing seems to work. To top it off the bigger incidents are at times months apart. Anyone have a similar problem and what did you do about it?

[cay8099]

Many kids have problems like this at school. The problem stems from a lack of activity/boredom. Your son could possibly be more advanced than what his classes are teaching, or he needs a tad more activity to relieve excess energy. My suggestion is to get him involved in things that will help release some of his energy or help teach him knew ways to express his feelings without taking it out on other kids. Sports, educational feild trips, and clubs are a good way to help. Hope I helped; good luck.

[BusyMommy3]

I'm just curious, have you had your son in any type of counseling or had him tested for learning difficulties? Some children be in gifted classes and extremely bright, but still qualify for learning problems. Those problems could be causing his frustrations and acting out. I personally don't think it's as simple as 'boredem'... Bored children don't necessarily throw things etc to the point of suspension. This may sound harsh, but if you are only 'talking to him' and not taking the next steps for help, I'm sure the school is frustrated and they have to keep other students safe, as well as not teaching 20 other kids that this is okay.
I'd start seeking outside help asap!

[dsantorejr]

yes, he has had counseling and has been in counseling within the school itself. He does not have a learning problem. In fact he is excelling. I don't think it is boredom either. We are not "just talking" to him either. He does not just lash out, but is usually provoked. The reaction is extreme to be sure. But so is the reaction of the principal & vice principal and often is it is consistent. They say one thing and do another. They are quick to enocourage him going to another school, a special ed school. They have given him a para to work with him in the class, but the para often is asked to help out in other areas, when she is specifically budgeted for him. So when something does happen, no one saw anything or it is too late to defuse it. It seems the prinicpal has already labeled him a "problem child" and wants to wash her hands of it. Again I am boasting a bit, but my son is very smart, has friends, and does not have any other problems like this in any other area of his life. Hence, the frustration.

[cay8099]

Perhaps the problem is not your son, but the school. Kids often do what is expected of them, and this behavior is what the teachers expect from him. How many times have these incidents been his fault? Perhaps, if this is an option, you should hire your own para that cannot be told by the school to help in other areas. Another school where your son has not been labeled is also an option.

[cay8099]

When I say "boredom" I mean that he is so far past what he is being taught that he's not learning anything new. There is no challenge for him. Therefor nothing for him to strive for, no new goals to reach for.

[Calamity_Girl]

I have lots of questions in regards to your post. If they have hired a paraeducator for him, how often are these episodes? You don't see this behaviour at home? When is it happening at school? They want to put him in a special school, for what? Has this behaviour been happening throughout his schooling; K, Gr 1?