5 yr old sleep and behavior problems

[psycrules]

I am seeking some good advice. We feel that we have tried everything with my daughter, who will be 6 next month, to get her to stay in bed. This and that she feels that she is equal to us is not a good thing. When she was younger we had more money and I gave her whatever she wanted. When she was bad we sat and reasoned with her. This might have created a monster. Since I got pregnant with my now 18 month old baby we have started to enforce that she is a child and we are the parents. We still try to reason with her but that has not helped. She yells at us whenever we ask her to do anything. She refuses to wash herself or brush her teeth without a fight. We've tried chore charts with prizes and punishing. It has not helped.
With in the past month we have had problems with her staying in bed. She wanted to sleep on the couch. I am a stay at home mom and told her she could do this if she gave me 2 hours at night. I would open her door when she could come out. This did not work. We tried asking why she was not staying in her room. She told us it was due to multiple posters. We got rid of them. Next it was her stuffed animals. We moved them into the babies room. Then it was all her toys. We moved them into the closet. We tried getting her a cool bed tent. We tried punishing taking away TV, computer, Wii. We tried if she stays in her bed for 5 days she gets any toys in the whole world. We tried stars and if she came out of her room 10 times and looses her 10 stars she was going to have no birthday party.
Each time she acts like she cares when we take things away but does not care about loosing the awards. I tell her all she has to do is stay in her bed for 1 night and she gets all her privileges back. She won't do it. In fact she told me at 1 point that she was going to annoy me until I gave into her watching. TV. I ignored her and this did not last long. Everytime she comes out I lead her back to bed and ask her why she comes out. Most times she ignores me after she's in bed.
I give her lots of attention I read to her. Especially every night before she goes to bed. I do activities with her. I listen to her all the time. She is quite the chatterbox.
Please if anyone has any advice please give it. Anything. Thank you.

[rb122920]

I would say to do what I've seen on Super Nanny a hundred times. And no I don't get all of my parenting advice from a tv show. Go through your bedtime routine tuck her in, say "I love you, goodnight," turn the light off, and leave. When she gets up bring her back into the bed, say "I love you, goodnight," and leave. After 1 or 2 of these, if she's still getting up, stop saying anything. Just put her into bed and leave. She's gonna through a fit but ignore it. She's not hurt. After a few days, she'll get over the bedtime thing.

[psycrules]

Thank you so much for trying to help. Unfortunately that's what we've been doing for the past 2 weeks. She has a very strong will. She screams so loud you'd think we were killing her and she keeps waking up my 18 month old daughter but even now we walk her back to bed most times asking her what's wrong if she doesn't answer in 5 sec we leave. Most times with her screaming.