Stressing about baby weight

[mother-to-be]

I consider myself to be a pretty rational person. My brain really does know that gaining weight is just par for the course when you have a baby, but some part of me is still panicky about it. I know that body issues are all-too-common (well, they've always been for me) and that I should give myself a break for just pushing this tiny little miracle out of my body.

Still, I have to ask for some advice: how do you stop stressing about dropping the baby weight?

[Amboq07]

As I read your post all I could think in my head was wow that sounds exactly like me. I have always had issues with my weight too. I have never been over weight but I have just always been insecure with it. During my pregnancy I was always stressing out about how much I was gaining and asking other people how much they gained... pretty much obsessed about it. I started out weighing 135 and I gained 35 lbs for my pregnancy. My son is now 2 months old and I have about 10 lbs left to lose that just will not come off! It seems like its not much but I am no where near fitting into my prepregnancy pants so I am now obsessing over that. Sometimes I just look at myself in the mirror and cry because I feel disgusting because of the baby gut. Any way I know exactly how you feel and I am sorry you feel that way, at least I am not the only one though. I have been going to the park everyday and I use one of those carrier things that you hook on and I walk the track holding my son. I briskly walk 2 miles about 4 times a week and I also just started doing a postnatal workout video and I am starting to feel a little better about things. Good luck!

[lilypaulrobinson]

While I was pregnant I used to wonder the same thing. I didn't want to gain a lot of weight.
Surprisingly, I didn't. I only gained about 20 pounds. I was 170 before pregnancy and 190 at 9 months. I used to worry about losing the weight. But I didn't have to worry about a thing. Now I weigh 153, it's less than how much I've started out with. My labor was almost 3 months ago..and I'm happy. I do a bit of exercising here and there. But the weight loss came on its own.

[mary84]

i hated my body after having 2 kids but i got used to it and i gained a feature i never had before kids...i can finally wear a c-cup instead of an a!!! so iguess it isn't all bad

[CrystalAnn]

I am in your boat. I started at 140 and gained thirty pounds. I was hoping it would come off quick because I had to be a bridesmaid two months after I gave birth...no such luck! I have been eating healthy foods with reasonable portions, and walking the baby when the weather is nice, and now after twelve months I have only four more pounds to lose. Of course, I was trying to get to 135 before I got pregnant, so I guess I really have nine more to lose, but I'll be happy to be back where I started. I was sort of depressed about how long it was taking to lose the weight, even though it has continually been dropping. I just don't have the time to devote to exercise that I used to. I've come to terms with the fact that body will be forever different. I have heard that even if a women loses all the weight, prebaby pants may never fit the same because of widened hips. I am still in the process of accepting this! Remember to love your body because of the miracle it has produced and be easy on yourself. I figure, I never really had a bikini body in the first place, at least now I'll have a good excuse for not having one!

[dani.donahue]

I feel the same. I hate my body. It has been 4 months and I still have 10 to go to pre pregnancy weight and 15 to my okay weight, and 20 to my dream weight. My clothes do not fit. My body is completely different now. I knew I would gain weight but changing the shape of my body....NO. I am beyond frustrated and am tearing up as I type. I hate my body. I feel gross. I want to look good again. I want to look good for my husband, but more for me. I don't understand how in just 2 months someone can get to below their prepregnancy weight. I watch what I eat. I exercise 3 - 5 times a week, I do strength and cardio. I am no where near fitting into my hot jeans. Any words of encouragement. I do not want to hear 9 months to gain, 9 months to lose.
Danielle

[mary84]

danielle, i am with you yeah i gained a great feature i never had before, but before i had kids i was 110 lbs size 2 jeans....i am now...and i hate myself for admitting this....150 lbs and size 12. i cant get it off i tried everything. i just find clothes that flatter what i have. i want to look good for my hubby but until i get there beauty is but a light switch away

[kelparka]

Everytime you are upset about your body look at your beautiful baby. YOUR BODY MADE THAT!!! Your body made a tiny heart, and a tiny brain, and little toes, and little lungs and put it all together to make a human being! That is insane and something to be proud of. I get really depressed too about my body and how I am only 21 and I will NEVER ever be able to wear a 2 piece ever again. Even if I lose all the weight, my stretch marks are so bad and there is too much extra skin.My baby is 6 months now, and most of the weight did come off without trying. (Mcdonalds and pizzza. Literally without trying. Yay for breastfeeding and the natural course of things)But the last of it is so stubborn!! I have gone from a size 3 prebaby to size 11. Thats a huge leap. I like to believe its becasue of my hips. But my baby belly STILL hangs over the pants that are 7 sizes bigger. That makes me want to cry. But you know what helps? I just got a cute new hair cut and highlights. Its amazing the difference a hairstyle can make. Now I feel I look less frumpy and more my age. And I invested in good facewash and teethwhiteners. Amazing how having white teeth makes your whole face look prettier. I also still shop in the materinity section (shhh) becasue the clothes are soo cute and their shirts are more empire wasted and make my hips look smaller and accent my new bossom. (side note, yes they may be bigger but they are flatter and not cuter. ppl left that part out) So cheers to motherhood and being hot mamas!!!!!! (psych yourself out.....)

[mrs.roberts]

I can completely relate! I have always been a petite person. Prebaby I was 110 lbs. and a size 2. I had a nice chest, not too small, not too big. I gained 60 pounds with my daughter. I ate sensibly, walked 30 minutes a day and still gained all that weight. It's so frustrating! I am currently about 130 lbs. and it's been almost 6 months. I hate the way I look. My breasts got huge while I was pregnant and now they are like empty gym socks. I have a flabby tummy that I can't seem to get rid if no matter what I eat or how much I exercise. My body is covered in ugly stretch marks even though I religiously used the anti-stretch mark cream throughout my pregnancy. There is not a day where I don't wish I had my old body back. The funny thing is that I didn't appreciate my fabulous body when I had it. Something was always wrong and it was never enough. Had I only known... My husband constantly tells me that I'm beautiful and that I'm way too hard on myself, but the thing is I don't feel like myself. I barely know who I am. I love being a mother but I don't love what it has done to me. I can't wear dresses or skirts anymore because of the stretch marks. I have to buy a size D bra but I truly only have the breast tissue for an A. I can't stand to look at myself in the shower and it's lights out for sex. We do it, but I want the lights out and to be on bottom because I can't look down and see my saggy boobs and tummy. I am constantly on the edge of crying. I'm so depressed and I feel like I have no one to talk to. My mom tells me I'm just being selfish. I know children are miracles but I don't think I can bear to have anymore. If the first one did this I can only imagine what another would do.

[Dr. Maria Rago]

Dear mother-to-be, Congratulations on your new baby! It is hard to remember every day that your body has been through so much and you need to treat it lovingly and encouragingly, and appreciate all it has done to keep you and your baby safe and healthy! You should write a letter to your body about how powerful, strong, precious, etc. it is and how you feel about it. Give it permission to bounce back to its old self in time, and let it know that you will be patient with it. Tell it how you are going to take care of it, including with food and exercise and sleep, so that it can heal from having your child. Every day remind yourself that recovery from childbirth takes time, and if it took a year to conceive and change to accommodate the baby, it can take the same to fully recover. I think journaling in a special place is very helpful to put things in perspective and keep in touch with your thoughts and feelings now. So much is going on, so many changes in your identity, home, body image, self image, relationships with others. It is important to keep tabs on all of it, and know that you are a good and understanding friend to yourself. Take care, sincerely, Dr. Maria Rago.