there are very few people aside from close family and friends that know my fiance and i are going through an adoption process. my boss knows, and she swore to keep it quiet until i was ready to let co-workers know.. and really i was surprised that it had never accidentally slipped out in conversation. im having my c-section on march 9, and she has been very respectful the whole pregnancy, not even talking about the adoption unless we are alone and have privacy.
until last nite, that is...
i went into work to get my new schedule and right away when she saw me she asked if i had been able to come to terms with the situation yet or if i was going to need counseling after the birth. it caught me off guard, because there were a lot of co-workers around and the resturant was actually pretty busy. she then started going into a conversation, asking me questions about how open the adoption is going to be, and if im going to be a part of the babys life, just really personal things that i was becoming very uncomfortable with. i noticed co-workers listening in shock and confusion, and all i could really do was say that i had to get going and run out of the resturant. i havent been trying to hide the adoption, but i have been keeping it on the down low because its a personal issue, and really i dont think that i owe my co-workers an explanation, as im not very close with any of them. they all have pretty much just assumed that im having a baby, and the normal stuff that goes along with it. why would they suspect anything different? they know i have a daughter already at home. im really upset though.. that my boss totally called me out infront of everyone. not only my co-workers, but guests of the resturant also. im dreading my shift today, because i know that rumors have probably already started going around, based on what they heard last nite. ugh.. why would she do that?? she knows that no one but her knew about it.. and that its a really delicate situation that i have a hard time talking about. its really bugging me that she didnt pull me aside, if she really had a bunch of questions, or needed to talk to me about it.. instead she just busted it out like it was no big deal and everybody knew everything about the situation. i dont know if i should talk to her about it and tell her how i feel or if i should just let it go.
Is she a nice boss? If so, she must have had her reasons for doing this and she probably thought it was for your own good. For instance, she might have thought you would find it difficult to bring up the topic to others and that's why she did what she did so the subject could come up easier.
If she's not a nice boss in the first place, then it could have been just a thoughtless thing for her.
Wow, I'm so sorry this has happened to you. Regardless of her intentions, she should NEVER have brought it up in public if you made it clear you wanted to keep things personal/private. Could she have overheard you and others discussing things and incorrectly assumed you weren't keeping things private any longer?
You must be going through such a difficult time without needing that aggrevation. Sorry you are having to deal with this on top of everything else in your life. Go with your gut on what to do. I think you probably already know what you should do, now it's just a matter of finding the courage to do it. Good luck with everything.
~ Hugs, Caren
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Everything happens for a reason my friend,so do not worry!!