Considering another but...

[Knicky]

Hello, I am 31 years old and have a daughter who will be 7 in just a month. I have considered having another child but I am worried about the gap in the age. By the time I have the baby she will almost be 8! I'm worried about my age as well, I am afraid I wont have it in me to take care of my older child on top of a baby.
There are other things that worry me as well. Currently I am in graduate school and I hope to continue on for my PhD so I am not working. I am a veteran so I do get the GI Bill and that helps with some expenses but its not nearly enough. My husband works a decent job but the pay isn't great so that adds onto the worry. We don't want to have to rely on the welfare system to take care of our children but if we have another child we are afraid that that is what would happen.
I would like to have another child but with all of these factors playing in, I don't think it would be feasible. I guess I really just wanted some place to rant. Thank you for listening.

[KOmom]

Well really that'll be your decision in the end but I can understand your point. I contemplate another child even though really I need to wait a little longer. But as far as the age gap me & my brother are 7 1/2 yrs apart & my mom loved it. We rarely fought as kids & even though I did experience some lonely times feeling like an only child, we are great friends even now so I would hope you would have the same experience we had! :-)

[HappyTim]

I wouldn't worry too much about the age gap between your kids. While your daughter and potential second child probably won't share a lot of interests, the older one can certainly teach the younger one a lot and even help out with caregiving.

The education and money issues are a far more serious concern. I'm not sure your timetable for finishing your PhD, but having a newborn will make finishing your thesis that much more challenging, assuming you can't get it done before the baby would be born. If you have 2 years to go, consider waiting a year and then trying to get pregnant. If you have four years of work left, you may have to choose between your education and having another child. This isn't really something anyone but you and your husband can decide for you. Good luck!

[Malea]

I agree ! Having a child is such a personal choice.

I wouldn't worry too much about the age gap between your kids. While your daughter and potential second child probably won't share a lot of interests, the older one can certainly teach the younger one a lot and even help out with caregiving.

The education and money issues are a far more serious concern. I'm not sure your timetable for finishing your PhD, but having a newborn will make finishing your thesis that much more challenging, assuming you can't get it done before the baby would be born. If you have 2 years to go, consider waiting a year and then trying to get pregnant. If you have four years of work left, you may have to choose between your education and having another child. This isn't really something anyone but you and your husband can decide for you. Good luck!

[bojana]

I agree with HappyTim. Age gap between your kids isn't a big problem but financial trouble is. You need to consider what will bee your financial situation in future and then decide what to do.

[organicallyhatc]

It is better to take one year gap for least case i am saying....

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