8 years ago I gave my baby girl up for adoption. It was the most painful thing I ever did in my life. My husband and I conceived her before we were married and we struggled with the decision we made for years. We know we were young and at the time had no money nor the ability to care for a child. I do feel peace about the fact that I gave her to a family with the ability to give her all I wanted to, however the pain of losing her will never subside.
I am now a mother to a baby girl of my own. She won't replace the one I lost, but I love her more than anything. My question is about my two girls. The adoption is semi-open. I know the parents first names just like they know ours. We don't know where they live, however for the first five years we kept in touch by letters through the agency. In ten years I have the ability to contact her through the agancy if I choose to, which I will and I can only hope that she will too.The question is: Should birth mothers raise/tell their own children that they have an older sibling that was given up for adoption?
My daughter is still an infant, but I think I should tell her someday. At the same time though I think it may be a very confusing thing for her to understand. You know, why we gave one up? Will we do the same thing to her? I just want to know the opinions of birth mother to kids who were adopted. What would you do? And if you do tell your own kids, how do you? Do you raise them knowing that or just tell them about it one day?