Another child with disabilities?

[Wishtobe_3]

I really want to have another baby. I have a child who is 14 months. i was told while pregnate that since he is a boy that he will have an over 70% chance of having autism like his dad, uncle and cousin. I am ok with that and am seeing signs of autism in him. And im ok with it. i know that my husband and i want another baby but should I? They will most likly be autistic too exept if its girl it will be less likely.And my son can he handle sharing his mom? And if my second child isnt autistic he or she wont get as much attention as the one who does. I really want a second child thow to take care and watch out for my oldest when we pass. I just dont know what to do. And talking about it with my husband, he cant think about the what ifs because of his autism!! I am a stay at home mom who is devoted to my son now i really think i have enough love in my heart for another. I have always wanted a big family bieng a only child myself. What should I do?

[Newmom!]

If the concerns of Autism are overwhelming, consider adoption.

[Newmom!]

Sorry last reply was so short, my son woke from his nap.
I would search out forums for parents with children with Autism. They would have thoughts on how their child adjusted to knew siblings, and how to make sure the siblings get enough attention as well. Regarding that, remember that as your son gets older he will be involved in more and more therapies outside of the house, and without you needing to be there. That will give you time to give attention to other children. Maybe just waiting until you son is a little older will be helpful.

There is also the thought, that I think you kind of expressed, is it right to bring another child into the world who is likely to have struggles? There is absolutely nothing with having a child who has a disability, but is it fair to purposely conceive a child who will most likely have needs when there are alternatives. I am not saying what you should do, I understand the pull of conceiving your own child, but you might want to consider adoption instead (or raising an only child). You might even be willing to adopt a child who has autism. That would be more work - but obviously you would be able to give that child a good home. Or consider becoming a foster parent. No child would stay with your very long - which means you can say no to more if your son needs more attention at a particular time - but you would be able to make a positive difference in the lives of many children.

This is a very hard question you have asked, as you very well know. Consider it carefully and find a place where other parents of children of Autism can share their experiences. Wishing your the best.