I am not trying to sound selfish or ungrateful in anyway but I had my shower last weekend. It was wonderful all the people that showed up including my aunt who surprised me last min, my mom and sister and nephew all flew in, it was great. The problem lies with we only got a few minor things we needed. My mom got us the travel system we registered for, my friend got us the pack n play and my sister the travel bed. Everything else is clothes and not even plain oneies. We only got 2 packs of diapers (not including the 4 boxes mom and aunt bought while they were here) and 2 packs of wipes.
We are first time parents so we have nothing we need. I have been to plenty of baby showers in my life and hosted a couple and I don't remember any of them not get anything on their registry. Not a monitor, not any of the bedding, we ended up with a couple of heavy blankets and few receiving blankets. We did get a number of gift cards and I am thankful for those as well as the things we did get but I can't help but be a little disappointed in the lack of necessities we didn't get that I registered for. With the exception of the travel system, the pack n play and the travel bed and the receiving blankets nothing else was from the registry. We ended up with 6 bottles that I may need to return because they are glass and I am not sure I want to use glass bottles.
Besides just needing to tell someone else because my husband doesn't seem to get it, he says "well, we got the gift cards we can just go buy it ourselves." The gift cards only cover so much.
My husband has been out of work for a month and everyone knows he has been out of work so things are really tight for us and about to get even tighter with the baby coming. I guess I thought with our situation and those knowing about it and knowing it's our first child there would have been more thought put into the gifts.
Has this happened to anyone else?
I didn't register for my baby showers. I just asked people for clothes, diapers and wipes. We purchased our own car seat to be sure we got what we wanted. As long as you have a car seat, diapers, and some clothes, you can get by. Everything else is just icing on the cake.
Remember too, that every one is hurting financially right now, not just you.
Also, just because you register that doesn't guarantee that people are going to buy it. It is their decision to buy what ever they see fit. If you don't like it, return it.
Loud mom of 2 loud boys ages 10 & 7.
I second Big Mouth. Also, hit up consignment shops and garage sales for the other big ticket items that you feel you need. When it comes to baby stuff there is nothing wrong with second-hand items. Your baby doesn't need a nursery to rival a celebrities, just a warm bed to sleep in, some warm clothes to wear, good breastmilk or formula to drink, and a mom and dad to love them. Everything will work out just fine, I promise!
also try craigslist.com i got most of my things from friends and family, second hand, and the rest i got off craigslist or real cheap (just make sure to meet in public!). at least you got the big main things from the shower. and try not to be upset about it, some people dont even get babyshowers
luckily theres Landin <3
January 12th, 2009
I understand your need to complain. I was kinda upset that I didn't get most of the things I needed either. I had two showers though. One thrown by my mother and the other thrown by my eboyfriend's mother. I put a couple outfits on the list, cuz I knew people would buy it whether I wanted it or not. The necessities I got? I got them all from my mother's shower. The other shower was clothes, clothes, clothes... and some books. I had to get my own blankets, my own diapers, my own stroller, etc. With all the clothes they had bought, they COULD have used the money they used on the 5-6 outfits to get something I needed. I didn't complain though, and when my ex's mom said, "You can return them if you want to." it just made me mad. Cuz the tone of her voice just irradiated that I was unappreciative. Which wasn't the truth. I just didn't NEED baby clothes. But I accepted them and kept them just to make sure there were no hurt feelings.
Ruby Ilene born May 27th, 2009.
7lbs 11oz and 20in long.
I understand other people are hurting for money too and I am not asking anyone to go out and buy us hundreds of dollars worth of stuff. I am not saying there is anything wrong with second hand items either and have yet to refuse if someone wants to loan me baby clothes etc. I have no problem using second hand items.
What I am trying to say Saphira said it best, those items that we did recieve people could have used that money to get soemthing off the registry especially some of the needed items.
I just find it strange since we do not know what we are having that people would buy so many clothes instead of the needed items.
Maybe I just need to complain about it because I was expecting one way and it went the opposite.
Take everything back and get what you need.
I always find it insulting when people EXPECT me to buy off the registry. If I'm buying a gift it is personal from ME. I want to choose it, I don't want to be told what to choose! If you don't like it, feel free to return it with the gift receipt. That's what it's for. But never EXPECT your friends and family to only choose what's on the registry. The registry is a suggestion, not a command, so don't treat it that way. Thank them kindly for the gift(s) and then return and exchange as you see fit.
I can see your frustration. When we had the twins, we got a ton of very thoughtful gifts. Most of them were handmade blankets. The only problem was that we ended up with 10 (yes, ten) sets of handmade blankets. We did the craigslist thing, and secondhand stores for some of the bigger items, and my mom really pitched in and bought a ton of clothes. So it worked out, but I know how you feel. I was extremely touched by everyone's thought and effort that went into all the beautiful quilts and crocheted blankets. I felt so selfish thinking that we had too many blankets and no monitors, clothes, stroller, etc. It worked out, though.
Mom of twin girls, age 3, and a new baby boy born in January!
I would be frustrated too, I would also return alot of those clothes (especially if they are the cutesie, not at all practical type) and get afew things that you need. I really don't understand why people buy things not on the registry, especially things like little ruffly dresses and newborn 4 piece outfits. No, they are not obligated to buy anything on there, but when you know that there are specific items that your friend, relative, etc would like, why not go with what you know will really be needed?