No sex after birth of our son

[DaddyOfOne]

This is the first time I have posted on a forum but am not sure where else to turn for advice

My girlfriend gave birth to our son 6 months ago and since then she has had no interest in sex, kissing, cuddling or anything else for that matter

In fact it has been longer than that because we never had sex whilst she was pregnant so it wil have been over a year since we have done anything

Also I work a good 2 hours away monday to friday to support them and so don't see my son through the week other than on skype before he goes to bed

I do help as much as i can when i am back friday evening to early monday morning when i set off for work, including sorting out whenever he wakes up on a night, which is quite often as he still doesn't sleep that well

Idon't know what more i can do to try ans get the spark back in our relationship because i still tell her she looks sexy, cook her nice meals when i am home and help out as much as possible but when we go upstairs its like there is now an atmosphear and we just face away from each other and go to sleep

I am beginning to seriously fear for our relationship and will do whatever it takes to make her happy because i love her so much, and i can't stand the thought of somebod else being the father figure to my boy were i not around

Hope i do not come accross as an ass on here because that is not how it is really, i just want us to be more of a couple again like before our son was born

I have probably waffled on for too long, but thank you for reding this and any advice would be much appreciated

[djasinski]

http://forums.parenting.com/showthread.php?t=8174

There are tons of replies here for your situation, hope this helps This dad posted the same situation a few days ago so..

[rickip]

Hey, you're not being an ass, sex is a normal part of a healthy relationship! I can sympathize with your situation, as I've been in your lady's place before. When I am nauseous, etc, the "drive" goes to nothing. And post-partum, it really was just gone. But I knew sex was important to my hubby, so I went ahead when I felt able (6 weeks) and actually was pleasantly surprised that it felt kind of good.

I would try to find time to talk to her about it - in a neutral setting - ie, don't bring it up in the bedroom! and explain to her first how much you love her and what a good mom you know she is. Her job is especially hard with you gone so much, and say you feel like you've been growing apart. Relationships change after a baby comes, and that's ok, but you need to rekindle what drew you together in the first place! You don't see your son much, but you need to get a babysitter and go out for dinner or at least a walk alone. Hold hands, just enjoy being the two of you for an hour, and see where it leads. Don't put pressure on her to get intimate right away, it's been a long time. Just give the "dating again" phase some time... Good luck!

[SConcreteAngel]

I hope you still come on here and see if anyone replied but I read this and being a first time soon to be mother it made me sad. If your still having problems then just sit and takl with her ask her if everything is okay. It might be a medical thing. And if she literally just never get "in the mood" there are pills out there for women like for men. See if she would like to try if that works. If it does then she will remember what its like. And the "woo" will come back. Just be open with how you feel.
Good Luck
~Sarah

[Klingon]

try giving her warmth of the relationshipand else it is very common factor that the urge to make sex is lost after pregnancy.

[Proud Dad]

My situation is not quite as bad, but I found my wife having intimacy problems after the birth of our son. My son is 2 and the problem still remains the same. We make love but, by no means as much as before he was born. I wonder if it may have something to do with your absence during the work week. You should talk to her about this and see what the problem may be. I think things may get better just give her time. I hope you guys work things out.