I have been a teacher for over twenty years and have a degree in special education. I don't know your son's teacher, but I do know that there are some teachers who do want a quick fix for boys who fidgit. You do, however, know your son and together with your sons teacher's info you should have an idea about whether you should pursue professional intervention at this point. It is better to be safe then sorry. You don't want to wake up years from now and regret that you didn't have him tested and so lost years of his life that he could have been paying attention and learning. Children with add or adhd will tell you, if you give them proper medication, that they feel better able to learn. That may take a few trys, however. There are so many meds out there and so you may have to try a few in order to find the one that works for your son. Also, he doesn't have to take them all the time. If he doesn't need to consentrate on anything and it is the weekend, he doesn't need to be medicated. At least find out what the cause of the fidgeting is. You may learn that it is just that he is a boy and boys do that. Put something in his hand to play with and it may help. The woman who wrote that she found out that her son was just depressed, made me sad. Depression is pretty serious and I hope that she took it seriously. You owe it to your son to find out what it is.
Last edited by Rachel4; 10-18-2009 at 02:58 PM.
My 11 year old step-son was diagnosed with ADHD/ODD 3 years ago. Up to that point, he was a living nightmare. At school, he would hit teachers and students, throw furniture, destroy textbooks and get suspended on a daily basis. At home, he would hit myself, my husband and his sister. He would scream and yell at us for any reason and wouldn't listen at all. We went looking for help and my husband and i were sent to parenting classes for a few months. We got him some counselling but finally we sought out a pediatrician who did recommend medication. We started him on low doses and worked are way up and his medication hasn't been increased in over a year. He still has issues but is able to control and calm himself better. The problem now it seems is that he doesn't want to listen to things being said to him.. for example, he doesn't wear his shoes properly and the backs of them are pushed right down so he just slides them on. This drives my husband crazy and we finally told him last week that if he keeps wearing his shoes that way, he was paying for the next pair as we can't afford to keep buying him new ones for him to destroy in a few months. He's refusing to wear his coat outside and it's a battle to get him to wear it. It's little things like this that are driving my crazy. Is this really the ADHD or is it just laziness?... please, any comments or help would be greatly appreciate.... thanks
The "bad parent" thinks that it is just normal tween laziness. I have a nephew who is 11 and he wears his shoes the same way and also refuses to wear a coat, wears shorts when it is really cold, refuses to take off his hat, etc. I think it's just a struggle for independance and all part of growing up.
PS If the person referring to the child with depression was referring to me, my son has ANXIETY NOT DEPRESSION, and he is seeing a therapist. I was meaning that just because a teacher diagnoses your child with a condition it doesn't mean that they truely have that problem. You need to do research on your own and take care of your own child as you see fit. Medication doesn't solve every problem.
Loud mom of 2 loud boys ages 10 & 7.
One other thing you could try is switching to more natural products in your home. This is in addition to diet...I'm not saying this cures ADD or autism or any other disorder, but I've talked to many women who have seen symptoms of these conditions greatly alleviated when they started using more natural products in their homes (personal care, vitamins, cleaners, etc.) There's an easy and economical way to do it, too. Sometimes kids will even react to an environment that has been cleaned with harsh chemicals, but will be fine elsewhere. Just a suggestion if you're looking for other things to try. I've shopped with a company that makes this easy and affordable since last year. If you want any more info, just shoot me a note at firstname.lastname@example.org
Try giving him a little bit of coffee. I know it may sound odd but I learned in my BIOPSYCH class at the University of Washington that the receptors activated by certain medications for ADHD are also activated by caffine. That's because in the lock and key mechanism used by neurons, both caffine and certain ADHD medicines have a similar "key" shape and fit the same "locks". A doctor recomended meds for my best friends sister but her mom refused. Instead whenever my friends sister became hyperactive, her mom would give her a sip of coffee and it would actually wind her down.
I'm with the group that says make sure it's ADHD before you do any medicating. My sister's kids may end up with it since their father has it, but they have been OK so far, no meds. They are both antsy and need to be challenged if they're going to give you their attention, and under no circumstances are they ever quiet or sedentary, which has gotten the older one in trouble many times since he started school this year. My sister is thinking that maybe they just need to be challenged more in school, something she dealt with at their age, and she sees that when she makes stuff hard for them they behave better. Our parents must have seen this as well in her because they got her moved up a grade so she could be more challenged. Another reason her kids may end up tagged as ADHD is that she is a very creative person, which means she does not run her household in the standard manner, is prone to messiness, and is not always consistent with rules. One of the results of this is that her kids are more comfortable (and therefore less compliant) with adults. They see themselves more as equals instead of subordinates and I think they honestly don't understand why and when it's important to be compliant. I'm not saying you should make your kid's life as difficult as possible, or that you're a slob, but if my description of my sister sounds like you, maybe that can help you (and others) understand what's going on. Even if I'm way off, good luck!
For your child's anxiety or adhd, whatever the diagnosis turns out to be, a good thing to try is neurofeedback, also known as eeg biofeedback. This treatment is non-invasive and can often be used instead of medication or to reduce the dosage. You can see a neurofeedback video and read more about it at mftherapy.com or on the eeg info youtube page. They have case studies and videos about different treatments and the results. Good luck!
For what it's worth...my daughter was diagnosed with severe ADHD. We were seriously considering keeping her back a year. We got her The Ultimate Fidget. She went from really struggling to excelling in school and at home doing homework. She is now at the top of her class and going into a Gifted and Talented Program.
My son is 6 and has been going to behavioral therapy for 5 months now. I just had him evaluated for adhd and they perscribed him ritalin. I was reading in one of the other posts that if your child can focus on something its not adhd? I have been trying to do research on this so I am confused?? He can focus on things for a short period of time. He is very forgetful. He talks non-stop. He is always moving. I had his thyroid checked and that is normal. I don't know what to think.
If your child is really diagnosed with ADHD, One alternative treatment for ADHD that is often considered by parents is sending their children to therapeutic boarding schools. It could be a difficult decision to make because it's not easy for parents to be physically separated with their child, however the benefits often far outweigh the anxiety of separation. Placing your child in a therapeutic boarding school as an alternative treatment for ADHD not only helps them but can literally save their lives
Last edited by julianclare; 02-24-2011 at 04:37 AM.