I also am a pasty white girl and my husband is hispanic. We have two little girls who right now are really to young to care about their heritage, and I honestly forget most of the time that they are mixed race-until we visit my husbands family! I totally know the feeling of not being part of the conversation (I speak no spanish and they speak no english)! My husband speaks spanish to our girls most of the time because we really want them to speak both languages. I don't know if it will work since I stay home and speak english to them all day. We also eat A LOT of mexican food! My husband makes traditional stuff on a regular basis and I hope that will expose them to their heritage in some sort of way. I think just being with the mexican side of the family will teach them more about who they are. Good luck!