My greatest fear and re-occurring nightmare since I graduated from college has been this absolutely horrifying idea that one day THEY would realize that I am not really a grown up and would take all my toys away. This fear really took a life of its own when I bought my first home - signing that mortgage agreement. I couldn't believe anyone was willing to loan me that amount of money. I have been sleepless over it ever since. When I bought my first new car, again night terrors that THEY would realize their mistake and come take my toys away. We adopted our daughter two years ago. The adoption process was agony for me, partly due to the grip this fear of discovery has on me. Unlike having a bio kid, I actually had to convince someone that I was grown up enough to parent her child when she felt like she couldn't. Would she - with her bio-Mom credentials - see through me? Well, we fell in love with her, and I suppose she with us. She did choose us for her daughter. We have been parents for two years, I am in my mid-to-later-than-I-want-to-admit-thirties, now. But THEY still linger in my paranoia about masquerading as a grown up. I still don't want to give up my toys, and would certainly never part with my daughter. It is nice to know that so many other women feel this way, too. Here's to us and the charade!