I wouldn't say your job is "as important as his." It's much more important! Caring for a child is demanding and difficult, and you have as much right to spend money as your husband. My husband stayed home for 6 months caring for our child, and I didn't begrudge him the occasional latte or comic book. I don't think I have the patience to stay at home, so if $3 is what he needs to stay sane while caring for an active 2-year old, well, that's money well spent. As for the Thai adventure, it could happen someday. And I bet the novel is do-able. Probably not now, but this whole parenthood-thing is supposed to get easier, right?