I'm not even sure how to word what I'm wanting to say to you, so I apologize if this comes out all scatter brained. When I was pregnant with my boys, I was scared. Not for the birth process, but for what came next.. bringing them home. When I gave birth to them, I did get the epidural, but I will not be getting it this time. The woman that gave it to me was half asleep. I now get numbness in my back in the spot that she gave me the shot. I'm more scared with this pregnancy because I know that I am not going to get an epidural. As far as what to do when you take her home, you have no need to worry. We pick these things up so easily. We're mommies. It's natural for us. I was scared to breastfeed, but it came so easily. Now granted, I didn't do it for long, but it was amazing. You will be great at it. Don't stress over all these things. Know what you want to do & stick with it. If I were you, I would stick to your plan of not using an epidural - it can do harm to you.