Feeding your Baby - The REAL Truth

[MamaPepper]

I don't usually jump on these boards, but felt it was Extremely important to say something about the article on page 89.

There was one sentence in particular I would like to quote regarding the myth -- Once your baby starts solids, he won't need much breast milk or formula--: "Breast milk or formula should still be their most important source of nutrition throughout the first year."

Throughout the article, I didn't feel the author was responsible in giving due to the importance of breast milk. If I were a new mom who didn't know better, I would have read that article and thought, "gee, formula is just as good as breast milk. . .", which even the AAP AND the formula companies state is untrue. I think that that sentence SHOULD have read "Breast milk is still their most important source of nutrition throughout the first year." PERIOD!

Also, in regards to the vitamin supplements. I have breastfed both of my boys exclusively and never given them vitamin D. Instead I get off my rear and take them outside for a few minutes so that they can get a natural dose of Vit D; the sunshine! My kids have been EXTREMELY healthy without vitamin supplements; even my son who has a complex heart condition.

It's irresponsible to underrate breastfeeding the way this article did, especially when you are talking about health.

Also, to the women's comments in the Mom Debate: SERIOUSLY! To deny your baby food because you are in a public place? That doesn't seem too tender and loving to me. And if the stranger with prying eyes, or the mom who "doesn't want to see a bare breast flipped out. . ." has an issue with it, then it is THEIR responsibility to move and stop staring at the natural and loving act between mother and child! It IS natural and shouldn't need to be kept private. I think that feeding your baby with a bottle in public should be kept private because it gives new moms the sense that THAT is ok. That's the real travesty here!! No wonder our nation is so unhealthy with people advocating formula and making women feel like they shouldn't nurse in public.

[LMoss]

I agree. I have never been on these message boards (is this how you post comments?) and I have to say that I got on for the exact two reasons you did. Mostly, however, I was aggravated by the poll. Sure, the comments were irritating--if you don't want to see a breast, look away, my child is hungry--but the fact that the pole exists is what infuriates me. I would like to say to Parenting magazine the following:

Allowing a balance of opinions in your magazine behooves the readers. Oppositely, bringing to light a non-debatable subject—should women have the right to breastfeed whenever they’d like—only provides a forum for ignorance. The right for babies and mothers to nurse in public is as established as fathers in the delivery room. Providing such a survey only takes away the clout breastfeeding mothers have worked so hard to attain.

The existence of the pole is what angered me!

[charliesmommy]

I understand where you're coming from but it would be much more irresponsible to say that breast milk is the single most important source of nutrition during the first year because not everyone can breast feed. Put yourself in the position of an adoptive mother or a mother who had breast cancer and ultimately a full mastectamy. They need to know that even though they have to feed formula they are still doing what's right for their babies.

[LMoss]

Of course they are. Women who cannot breastfeed--ill, etc.--know they are doing what they have to do. That part of the equation is just as understood as breastfeeding is the best. This simply proves my point--it is all established. Parenting was wrong to bring such a closed topic to light in the form of a survey. The pole was about women breastfeeding in public. Women have every right to breastfeed in public. Breasts are for feeding young. I reiterate; a forum for the ignorant (those who believe feeding babies should be hidden) will bring about just that to the magazine--ignorance.

[charliesmommy]

I was refering to the first part of the OP's message. I agree with you regarding breastfeeding in public. So much so that I no longer speak with my life long best friend because while I was still breastfeeding my son she compared it to deficating and urinating. Unfortunately breasts are seen as sexual objects in the U.S. making it an issue. :(

[LMoss]

That is really too bad about your friend.

I agree; breasts are seen as sexual objects. (I think) It is because people are attracted to what makes us fertile. For instance, men often like women with wide hips and curves. Well, that is what most say is "child bearing appropriate." I think people are attracted to large breasts because they are part of reproduction, or nature--which of course, is breastfeeding. Until the general public no longer sees breasts as sexual, most people will think they are sexual objects. Of course, they are not.

[charliesmommy]

I couldn't agree more!

[xanthin1]

This is the first time I have ever left a post on Parenting, but I too was disturbed by what I read in the article Feeding your Baby in this months issue. Particularily the "pop quiz" segement on vitamin suppliments. First of all, it states that breastmilk is lacking in Vitamin D, which is completely untrue. Breastmilk does have D, although the amounts are small. However, the amount is less important since the form it comes in is easily digestible, and for babies easily absorbable. Furthermore, normal exposure to sunlight will make up for the difference. So unless you live in a cave or underground, this will be enough. Even in Canada, or the northern most regions of the united states, I myself live in Western Washington, vitamin suppliments are unnescessary, unless there is a deficency in the mother, or a combination of other circumstances (no exposure to sunlight, darker skinned babies). To suggest otherwise perpetuates the myth that breastmilk is not exactly what your baby needs.

[LMoss]

Thank you for putting that up here. I read that (about vitamin D), dismissed it, and forgot to mention it. It does need to be mentioned. It is almost as though all publications are afraid to come out and say COMPLETELY formula is not as good, it cannot be as good, and you just need to breastfeed. Magazines would rather just dance around the idea. Until the public (news, magazines,etc.) stand up and say: women need to breastfeed because it is the best and women need to put aside the, it hurts, I tried, I didn't make enough, and all other unfounded excuses for your baby, women will continue to dump formula down innocent babies' throats.

Sorry to get so mad. I just cannot stand an otherwise solid publication perpetuating the idea that formula is ok. It isn't and educated people know it isn't. Breastfeeding can be hard (I really struggled at the start), but I kept with it. Why did I keep with it? It is the best thing for my child. Nobody ever told me parenting would be easy, and being a good parent means feeding my child nutritious food.

[TrubearJ]

Lmoss....your thoughts intrigue me. NOT!!! I breastfed my newbie for five months; he was recently weaned. I was not producing enough since four months. It's a good idea to review why some mothers cannot or do not breastfeed. Even those mothers that have the best of intentions. I DO NOT feel ashamed that my son is formula fed and I should not. Yes, breastfeeding is best for the first year. However realize that formula is the next best thing. It keeps my son healthy and it keeps him growing. Before you post again, you should keep in mind mothers like myself who have no other choice. Mothers who adopt, mothers who've had breastcancer (thanks charliesmommy) and mothers who have had other issues. Keep them in mind. :<

[LMoss]

The entire reason that I came to this post was to discuss why the media, magazines, etc. continue to diminish breastmilk. In a magazine that is perpetuated as educational, I think Parenting really messed up for the May edition.

According to dictionary.com, formula is "a liquid food for infants, containing most of the nutrients in human milk." So I am sorry for all babies that do not receive breast millk. I do understand why women that have cancer, AIDS, or that adopt a baby (and other such circumstances) are glad to have formula. Hopefully, as milk banks become more common, formula will no longer be sold.

You suggested that I do my research. I reviewed my two breastfeeding books and went to several breastfeeding websites. Although I clearly do not know your circumstances, my sources reiterated what I have always read: if a mother's milk dries up, she must not nurse enough (leaving her baby overnight, not pumping at work), be taking medicine, not bevdrinking enough water, and the list continues--these were the ones most mentioned. It is sad that such a lack of information probably leads women who want to breastfeed down a road where they do not know what to do. The world, actually mostly the USA, needs to be educated so that women know the rules when breastfeeding. Women used to smoke and drink while pregnant, and now it is well known not to do that. Hopefully, breastfeeding rules and techniques will be just as common some day.

I am sorry your milk dried up.

Lastly, you state I should keep other mothers in mind. You should as well. Parenting truly offended me. I have sacrificed lots to breastfeed my son for 15 months. Acting as though I could have or should have given his formula is wrong, and insulting. Parenting magazine offended me (and clearly other mothers from this thread) because of their manner of treating the topic of breastfeeding. Until Parenting and other mother/father sources realize that insulting breastfeeding mothers is wrong, little will change.

Stepping around people because it might hurt their feelings seldom moves causes forward. Magazines and the media need to be direct in asserting that breastfeeding is the best, and should be done in public anywhere. Formula does save lives for babies that have no alternative. The problem, of course, is that most often, formula is not needed. This is proven, but rarely said.

[CJUMom]

Whoa. I hope it's comfortable up there on your high horse.

Breastmilk is best. Everybody knows that. Formula commercials even advertise that fact. But, formula is not poison, for crying out loud! To suggest that a national publication should eliminate any mention of formula as a means for feeding is ludicrous, as is your offense at the mere thought that any babies should be fed by any other means than the breast.

In your most recent message, you clearly contridicted yourself. You state that you are so highly offended that Parenting even suggested formula feeding and the editors should eliminate any suggestion of it; however, in the next paragraph, you state "Stepping around people because it might hurt their feelings seldom moves causes forward." Wouldn't completely eliminating the word "formula" from all articles be a means of "stepping around people because it might hurt their feelings?" Or would it then be acceptable, because it's what YOU want? It would satisfy your "needs," but would then be highly offensive to the formula-feeding adoptive, breast-cancer surviving, can't-breastfeeding-due-to-necessary-medication mothers.

In this "Age of Tolerance," the media cannot be biased in their publications. That's life, honey. How would you feel if you were watching the news, and the station you were watching promoted only ONE political candidate and insisted that voting for anyone else would be "uneducated or immoral?" That any other idea, candidate, etc. was completely unacceptable? I'd be willing to bet you'd be furious.

You can't please everybody. So, when writing and editing a magazine, all sides to the breastfeeding/formula feeding debate need to be handled in a neutral, non-biased manner. Sorry to break the news, but that's LIFE. Get over it. And please refrain from insinuating that formula-feeding mothers are giving their babies poison, from now on. Thanks.

[LMoss]

I never used the word poison, you did. I would hope you wouldn't give your child something that you consider poison.

I don't contradict myself. Moving breastfeeding forward is the right movement. According to me? No, according to researchers, scientists, doctors, AAP, nurses, and the list continues. So do I think we should promote breastfeeding; by giving women the idea that formula is an acceptable alternative, many of them will take it. It isn't. Look at our society. Do you think it could be improved? I do. I think women breastfeeding is one way to do so. Do I think breastfeeding will solve all problems? No, but it might help many of them.

You are right. No publication can please everyone, but all publications take a stand, whether you realize it or not. Parenting was taking a stand that it was ok to put doubts in breastfeeding mothers' minds. It is not. This cause has to move forward. (What is the opposite cause? Moving formula forward?)

Before anyone posts anymore remarks such as this: "would then be highly offensive to the formula-feeding adoptive, breast-cancer surviving, can't-breastfeeding-due-to-necessary-medication mothers." Please read my prior remarks stating that of course, formula saves lives.

My entire point (that many want to ignore because they cannot argue this point and want to attack me) is that breastfeeding is best and it needs to be advocated as such. Until women receive the support and education they should, women will turn to formula. The media does need to take a stand, especially such publications as Parenting.

Up with breastfeeding, down with formula. Shouldn't every mother who can medically breastfeed have that as her moto? If you don't have a medical reason, breastfeed! Let's change society and laws so that women can help their babies! I don't see why it can't start here, with us, and with Parenting.

[TrubearJ]

In my opinion, there has been a movement towards breastfeeding over formula feeding. If this wasn't the case, I would've refused to breastfeed as long as I had. Parenting has, at least it seems to me, supported breastfeeding. They also, however, realize that formula feeding needs to be recognized. There are two ways to feed a baby...they recognize that. Anyhow, you can walk into a WIC office and see "breastfeeding is bestfeeding" on a banner and they have support groups. The hospital I delivered at encouraged breastfeeding (at least trying for the duration of the hospital stay) and my midwife discussed with me the importance of breastfeeding. There is a huge movement towards breastfeeding already in place. Yes, there still has to be more changes. Yes, your other comments were offensive so please keep that in mind.

[LMoss]

No, they were not offensive. If mothers don't mind the truth, they will not mind hearing that almost all mothers (see before mentioned exclusions) can nurse. If so many mothers cannot nurse for the time suggested by the AAP, then more education or research needs to be done. Nurses in the hospital need to be more helpful and educated. Pregnant women need to receive solid information so they can be prepared for nursing. The truth is the truth, and stepping around toes is not going to help babies or educate mothers.

So many women "try" breastfeeding. OK, this is a forward move, but lets keep moving. You have an incorrect latch and it hurts? Hospitals/doctor's offices need to have resources so these women can get help.

I agree. Lots has changed for the better, but more can be done.

I work in a school (I am a teacher) and 7 women have given birth in the last 2 years. Of the 7, only 2 nursed past 1 year and 1 nursed for 3 months. That is great, but the other 4 never even tried nursing--they said it was disgusting and that formula was the same. 4 out of 7--women with college degrees--said this. That makes me think education needs to prevail.

[Jordyn]

I disagree with the part of the article that talks about how if your baby is having a hard time with cows milk then soy milk is actually worse and harder to digest.

When I would feed my son cows milk it would physically hurt him he would fuss and and arch his back and scream out in pain everytime he ate. He lost weight in this process because it just hurt him to eat. It was so hard to see the tears in his eyes when we tried to feed him. He was actually scared to eat.

We talked to our son's doctor about it and he handed us a sample of soy formula to try. We took it home and started feeding our baby soy and he hasn't had a problem since! All of the sudden he was eating and eating well! The crying and the pain stopped. He also went to the bathroom a whole lot more. (He would hardly poo before the soy) and when we brought him back to the doctors they told us his weight was wonderful and back up to what it needed to be. This was after he was givin soy.

He is a healthy strong 4 month old baby and If we had kept feeding him regular formula I bet he wouldn't be.

His father also drank soy formula when he was a baby (because coys milk hurt him too) and he is now a healthy strong man. There could be a connection between father and son I supose.

I just think it's wrong to assume that in every situation soy formula is a bad resort. Soy worked for us!

[jenn_0629]

LMoss, I think that your posts have reached a point to where you aren't stating this to be factual, you are stating it to cause an uproar. What would you have done if your child could not latch on properly? Would you starve him until he did? No, my guess is that you would have started buying some formula. You say that almost every woman can nurse, and really, that is not the case. It is not possible for some women, do not act as though it is. Some women, yes, choose not to breastfeed..And the key word in that sentence is CHOOSE. It is their child, their choice..not your's and not America's. If someone told you that Johnson & Johnson was the best lotion to use for your child's skin, but you were using Huggies..would you change what you are doing because a woman (AKA--you) were looking down upon others for using that brand? I wouldn't. I am a mother, just like you..and what I think is best for my child goes. "Breast is best"...yes, we know...And I am planning on breastfeeding exclusively once my son is born. But I can also see the other side of things, and perhaps you could spend a little time doing that instead of argueing on a Message Board?

[Jordyn]

Well said jenn!

After I had my son I wanted to breastfeed but I had some complications after he was born in my own body and I was given medication so that I could not breastfeed. In the time I took the medication I had to feed my baby with a bottle. I wasn't gunna let him starve. He would not go to me!

There is such a thing called nipple confusion in infants. It happens a lot. if problems occur where the mother can not breastfeed for some reason sometimes a child who only knows the bottle will only go to the bottle. And I'm sorry but I wasn't gunna let my child starve and I also wasn't gunna whine and feel sorry for myself because I couldn't breastfeed. I do not feel guilty or ashamed for bottle feeding my son especially because like his father he has trouble with eating and digesting his food and he does best on soy formula anyway.

My mother also had several complications after I was born and she bottle fed me. I am now a healthy young women and I was also always a healthy child. My husband and all of his 4 siblings were also all bottle fed by his mother's own CHOICE! They are all heathly strong adults. My nephew who is about a year older then my son is also bottle fed he is a healthy little boy.

I am in no way saying that bottle feeding is better. I believe that breast probably is better. But I believe it depends on you and your family. It is each individuals choice. You cannot judge what is best for each individual because you are not them or in their situation. Just because they are bottle fed does not mean that their parents don't love them just as much as you love your child.

I'm glad you breastfed your child. If I could have, I would as well. I think it is wonderful when mother's can.

You also state:

"Stepping around people because it might hurt their feelings seldom moves causes forward. Magazines and the media need to be direct in asserting that breastfeeding is the best."

I read all sorts of baby magazines I love to read them. I read several each month And I know that almost all magazines,books that I read do state that "Breastfeeding is best, breast feed for as long as possible etc."

I am not offended by that because I know that what I am doing is right for my son. When they said that you could use formula they where refering to those people that cannot breastfeed. They were not telling you that it was as good as breast milk because clearly it's not and I have read and heard everywhere that is is not as good as breast milk.

No matter what the situation women like I still get crap from everyone for not breastfeeding because they asume we are too lazy or we don't want to. I really am not offended by this because I know that they don't know the situation and they don't know me.

It's a waste of energy to get offended over a statement as little as the one you are refering to in the first post.

Just my opinion.
I respect yours too.

[MamaT]

Ok.I'm new here so forgive me if i do this wrong.
I dont really reply to posts.. but this one angered me a bit. I'm not here to start an argument,and i mean no disrespect to anyone. I'm just stating my opinion.. as have all others.
The breastfeeding formula debate has been going on FOREVER. I agree that yes, breastfeeding is the best.. but as a mother who couldn't breast feed, i was thankful for formula. I COULD NOT make enough milk. I tried it yes. Sure it hurt, and when it did I asked if i was doing it properly and got the help. I did EVERYTHING the doctors said to do.. and could not make enough. I'm sure I'm not the only mother that this has happened to. It got to the point where both the baby and I were crying our eyes out at 2 am for hours on end.. cause it wasnt working for either of us. To judge women, without knowing the whole story as to why they're feeding their baby formula is unfair.
If you can breastfeed i say go for it! But to people who cannot for any reason.. you can't let your baby starve.. so you do what you feel is best.
thanks for letting me add my opinion

[lou]

I am pregnant with my first and fully intend to breastfeed. why, because as all sources have indicated breast is best for the baby. I don't think there are any discrepancies about that whatsoever. However, formula feeding also needs to be advertised for those who, for what ever reason, aren't capable of breastfeeding. you must keep in mind that formulas are a product and products are advertised in media whether it be TV, magazines, radio, whatever and there are many different types of formula so that creates competition in the market thus you get more aggressive advertisers. parenting is a magazine meant for mothers so it only makes sense that they would advertise formula. As far as i know not one of these advertisers has even attempted to contend with the fact that breast is better. As I said I am a new mother and I never thought for a moment reading this article or seeing any advertisement that formula was as good as breastmilk.

That being said, I really must say I don't think this is a topic deserving of such heated debate. no one has disputed the fact that breast is best. it seems to me it's being agrued whether formula should even be advertised. how could anyone argue that. as I said formula is a product, products get advertised. I for one was not at all offended by the article or any advertisements and I think if you are you're reading a bit too much into it.

LMOSS- you say "Look at our society. Do you think it could be improved? I do. I think women breastfeeding is one way to do so. Do I think breastfeeding will solve all problems? No, but it might help many of them."
How exactly do you mean that breastfeeding will improve our society? what by cutting healthcare costs because breastfed babies don't get sick as often? don't read too much into what you here. you must keep in mind the demographics and size of the samples used in these studies as often times they aren't similar enough to be comparable or the sample itself is too small.
OR do you mean that breastfeeding has been shown to improve IQ? again look at sample size and demographics. Also, Learning to play a musical instrument at a young age, before seven, has also been shown to increase IQ. does this mean those who do not provide this resource for their children should be condemed or judged harshly?
Furthermore, it could also be said that formula feeding helps society. think of all the jobs it provides for people who then go spend their earned money which keeps our economy going. there are so many different companies that produce and advertise formula. what happens if it stops getting made? thousands of people lose their jobs and the economy falls, unemployment rises and I would be willing to bet crime rates are positively correlated (if I couldn't provide necessities for my child and had no other option or felt I didn't even I would steal).
My point here is that one is not always better than the other to an extent that there should be no other.