8 w/ an attitude!

[busybee3]

Help!

I have 3 boys 10-8-3 1/2 and the middle son has become a terror over the summer. They are up by 7 am as usual and go to bed by 9ish. They read and have to earn their xbox and tv time just like usual.

But lately, he has been talking back to the karate sensie who is an ex marine! We have moved him out of the class he has with his older brother and now I have to go 4 times a week, ugh. Last night I tried the two together and they promised to be good. Well #2 insisted that #1 be his partner and a fight ensued. Then he was benched. So instead of walking off the floor and apologizing, he stomped and proceeded to be kicked out of the room. Now, sensei is very patient and I cannot disagree with the way he has tried to peacefully handle my son.

He went to the principle in kindergarten because he didn't want to wait his turn and told the reading teacher he was unfair, then proceeded to turn his back on the man!

I have tried so many tactics from grounding to talks to punishing him and taking away his tv and gamers.

Is this just the way he is wired or is it possible that he has a situation that needs medical or psych. attention?

[racerfamily4@yahoo.com]

I think its def possible that there is an underlying med condition. Alot of issues such as ADHD or ADD is not discovered until the child is around that age. I would ask your ped if they can recommend a child psyc or other doc that specializes in disorders. Most ped's dont know enough about this stuff and mis diagnose, which is so sad because everyone suffers.

[hardworkinmama]

He's 8 and the middle child. Sounds to me like he is trying to get attention. Have you and your husband tried spending alone time with each of the boys? Maybe focusing a little bit more on the 8 year old? Also, you could try praising him when he is being good. I think you should try these tactics before jumping on the "my child needs meds" bandwagon. Too many children are diagnosed as being ADD or ADHD because their parents can't control them. Don't be one of those parents. Try everything you possibly can before putting him on meds. Hope this helps.

[busybee3]

Thanks ladies for the advice. I see both sides of the coin and that is where my problem lies. My husband and his male side of the family often have ADD & ADHD. So my oldest son has it too. Because of this, we have game nights and I often take just one of them with me to do errands or to the library or have "date night" alone with each one.

I agree that alone time is very important!

I have tried the whole gambit of organic and no hormone foods, better vitamins, firm bed time schedules with all of them knowing kids needs guidelines. I hear it all the time that they do better in the younger years.

Well, I'll keep looking for other tips and keep an open mind.

Thanks!