lou
04-15-2008, 01:41 PM
I was reading this article, QUIRKY DISCIPLINE RULES THAT WORK, and when I got to rule #7 it made me think of my version of the "I'm Bored" rule. I have two step-children ages 7 and nearly 9 (and a baby on the way) that are constantly bored. I understand that they may have feelings of insecurity and thus need attention from my fiancé and I, but there has to be boundaries. They want our constant attention and as much fun as army, cops and robbers, and guns can be I'm just not always up to it, especially as I get bigger (21 weeks). When my fiancé and I started dating I noticed he would go down a list of things they could do on their own and then just let them watch TV or play video games. I am a strong believer in limited TV time (1/2 an hour/day if that and an occasional weekend movie) and self entertainment. So needless to say, after running my feelings on the subject past my fiancé of course, this soon changed and for the better. Now when confronted by the infamous "I'm bored" proclamation we reply simply that they "find something to do or we'll find something to do for them" (i.e. dishes, cleaning their room, dusting, picking up sticks from the yard, etc.). This does require follow through and consistency. They’re not allowed to just sit and watch us do whatever we're doing, most the time they say this while we're cooking dinner and will just sit at the table watching us. After a few times of putting them to work we no longer hear the “I'm bored” whine. This has worked great for us as we either got extra help with household chores out of this rule or two active, imaginative, and self entertained kids, that will amazingly enough actually get along (if they fight amongst each other while playing we'll also find something for them to do), rather than a couple of couch potatoes. Here’s the excerpt from the article that made me think of starting this thread. So what are your rules that work?
Rule #7: There's no such thing as boredom
Goal: Prevent your child from saying "I'm bored"; teach her to entertain herself
A friend of mine says this is one of the few things he got right with his kids. The first time his older daughter claimed she was bored he simply denied that the thing existed. Now he sometimes adds: "There's no such thing as boredom, only failure of the imagination" or "...only mental laziness." Surprisingly he's never gotten the "There is too boredom!" argument, only an exasperated "Da-ad." Regardless of the phrasing, the result is the same: The burden of amusement lands directly on your child, which is precisely where you want it.
Why it works: By the time your kids have figured out the puzzle of how something that exists can also not exist, they won't be bored. Also, it changes the terms of debate, from a challenge for you (list all my toys, then cave in and let me watch TV) to one for them. Besides -- if your child learns how to entertain herself, there truly is no such thing as boredom. And that's a gift that will last all her life.
Rule #7: There's no such thing as boredom
Goal: Prevent your child from saying "I'm bored"; teach her to entertain herself
A friend of mine says this is one of the few things he got right with his kids. The first time his older daughter claimed she was bored he simply denied that the thing existed. Now he sometimes adds: "There's no such thing as boredom, only failure of the imagination" or "...only mental laziness." Surprisingly he's never gotten the "There is too boredom!" argument, only an exasperated "Da-ad." Regardless of the phrasing, the result is the same: The burden of amusement lands directly on your child, which is precisely where you want it.
Why it works: By the time your kids have figured out the puzzle of how something that exists can also not exist, they won't be bored. Also, it changes the terms of debate, from a challenge for you (list all my toys, then cave in and let me watch TV) to one for them. Besides -- if your child learns how to entertain herself, there truly is no such thing as boredom. And that's a gift that will last all her life.