Lost my temper

[threeRmine]

and slapped my 7-year old on the cheek; not hard, but doesn't matter. He was sooooo hurt. I feel horrible and don't know what to do now. I got into a power struggle over him needing to bathe, and he kept telling me "no" and "shut-up" and "don't care". He doesn't do this with my husband, but lately has been doing this with me more and more often. I usually can respond appropriately, but lost my cool tonight. I continued to talking to him, and apologized and told him I was wrong and made a mistake. Asked him if he could forgive me and he said no. I eventually got him into the shower (but had to wrestle him to the floor to get his trousers off) but he wouldn't speak to me. I tried to tuck him into bed after his shower, and he pulled the covers over his head and wouldn't say anything to me. I understand he needs to hurt me, but it hurts...

[cay8099]

You lost your cool; it happens to the best of us.

Many times children do things just to make us lose our cool. They test their parents. It's what they do. Try dealing with these power struggles in an indirect manner. It's bathtime; you have exactly 10 min to get upstairs and into the shower. If in 10 min you are not in the shower I will ground you from the playstation for a full day. You MUST follow through if you are going to use this tactic. He will walk all over you if you make the threat and then don't ground him. If again tomorrow he doesn't do as you say add another full day. If he listens for a week and then doesn't listen it's 3 days. Don't let him see you lose your cool; leave the room if you have to.

One more thing: Remove the banned item from his possession. That way he can't do it anyway; when you're not looking. Talk to your husband about this and make sure he is going to back you up. If he doesn't back you 110% it will not work.

[angeela]

He is doing like this to heart u & its really hurt..
Try not to loose temper in future because like we peoples children also like language of Love..

[lafin33]

Sounds like you can use some help setting limits. (Every parent needs some help from time to time.) My just published book "My Child Won't Listen and other early childhood problems" by Linda Griffin, MS is easy to read and will answer many of your parenting questions that relate to issues at home, at school and with friends and family. Check it out! You can look inside the book at bn.com (Barnes and Noble)

Good luck.
Linda Griffin

PS Find out what to do with a picky eater and how to better manage bedtime.

PPS Learn what to do when you and your spouse disagree about parenting issues.

[slgaringer]

HI Moms I'm sooo glad someone brought this up. My 10 year old pushed me hard over the edge the other morning before school and I completely lost my cool and threw my purse across the room.... it knicked him in the head and that was it. I feel sooooooo awful I can't stop crying. My ex husband called me and talked to me about it I was sooo ashamed. I'm so glad to hear that we are all human and go through similar situations. I'm reading the book How to listen so your kids will talk and how to talk so your kids will listen (something like that) it is very helpful ... If you want I can post more accurate information about this book. Bottom line is I do not want to be that kind of mom. HELP

[timamr]

I am a divorced father with a 7 yr old son. I love him to death but I expect him to obey his elders. My ex-wife will sometimes tell me how aweful he has been when I pick him up and she uses examples and I simply tell her if she would spank his butt, he will straighten up. I know she threatens but never does so he gets away with it and then she thinks he is in the wrong. With me, he knows that if I tell him something, I mean it. There is nothing wrong in my opinion with whipping your child till they cry. Thats how they learn: from pain. Once your 5 yr old touches an open flame and burns himself a little, he wont ever do it again. Why? Because of pain! Nowadays alot of parents just do not disipline thier children enough. And yes, I ground him, take the ps2 away but ultimately I will wear his butt out even if it hurts me to see him cry from the physical pain I inflicted. Which brings me to my parents FAVORITE saying when I was a kid....."son, this hurts me more than it hurts you" Now I know what they meant but, we as parents must continue to help instill the right ethics, moral, and respect to our children, even if it sometimes hurts us emotionally at times.

[veronica4x4]

Have some special together time, Tell him that you still love him <3 If You to are having fun together tell him you could do it more often if he does what he is told to do. And don't worry he WILL get over it. :)