Changing Clothes/Diapers-Help!

[Tricia S]

I am new to this website and am a first time mom with a 21 month old daughter. She is very sweet, helpful and loving - most of the time. Lately we cannot change her diaper or get her dressed with out a full blown tantrum and fight. Today was the worst yet. 25 minutes 2 time outs and off to day care with wild hair and with out a coat. She doesnt have the vocabulary yet to tell us why she is so mad. I have a feeling this is just her age but am hoping there is some advice to help us out! We hate putting her through so much trauma every day, not to mention our patience.

[NaomiK]

How about telling her before its time to change her diaper that you are going to. "Ok were gonna change your diaper in 5 minutes". You can even set a timer. I have heard this approach works wonders with many things.
Have you started potty training? If not maybe she is ready. As far as her clothes, let her try to put them on. Or let her pick them out. Maybe she will be more willing if she doesnt feel like she is being forced. Give her lots of choices. Pink socks or white? etc. I do think that you need to let her know immediately that it is not ok to throw fits like that. You cannot let her think that is how she gets her way. Time out is good, also make sure you give her positive reinforcement. If there is a time when she doesnt throw a fit, praise her and tell her how proud you are. Hope this helps!