View Full Version : Someone please help
12-04-2008, 12:37 PM
My 2 1/2 year old is out of control. Shes refusing to sleep, her attitude is nasty, she refuses to do anything asked. I feel like shes changed overnight! Up till a month ago she was the sweetest kid you'd ever meet. Now I dont even want to take her in public! I know the lack of sleep is a huge part of her attitude but i'm running out of options. I cant keep her locked in her room till she passes out. Any suggestions????
12-04-2008, 12:50 PM
Let me guess, you're hearing the word no alot. She is realizing that she is her own person, and not mommy's appendage. This is when they learn autonomy, and refusing to nap or do what they are asked is how a toddler at this stage establishes her me-ness. Give her as much control over her life as you can by giving her choices. Do you want to nap now or in 30 mins? Then set a timer when it goes off it's nap time. Let her decide between 2 outfits which one she wants to wear. Does she want a banana or an apple for lunch. Does she want milk or orange juice with breakfast. Simple easy choioces that won't over stimulate her growing mind will give her a sense of control over her life and possibly make it easier for everyone involved in this ME stage.
Something that really helped us with this stage was a naptime bear. My son got to go to Build-A-Bear and pick out a stuffed bear to use only during naptime. This got him excited about nap time rather than fighting us on it. He still fusses a little when I tell him it's time to go lay down, but once I bring out the bear, he gets into bed.
I also agree with cay. This is normal behavior for a 2 1/2 year old. Choices will help a lot. Also if she's willing try having her "help" you when you are out in public. My son loves to put the non-breakable groceries into the cart, pick which color apples we get, and "hold" the car door open while I load our purchases. We always heap on the praise when he does help. Telling him things like "Oh wow what a big boy for helping daddy with the bags!"
12-09-2008, 12:40 PM
You may not agree with me on this, but I think that there are very few toddler attitude problems that cannot be fixed with a wooden spoon. Didn't everyone's mom have a wooden spoon? That is the only choice-you can do as I ask, or you can go get me the wooden spoon.
12-09-2008, 04:10 PM
I agree with a wooden spoon, which you wouldn't have to use often. But otherwise options are key. (As far as I've read, we're not quite in that stage yet. She is only 16 months, but she already has attitude.) I've been reading up for the next stage and what Cay8099 has said, is pretty much what I've been coming across. Good luck!
12-10-2008, 03:07 PM
We have a 2 year old in the same stage. If she sasses she sits in time out. If she cant play right, she can sit in time out. When we try to put her in bed, she throws a royal fit. She kicks and screams and kicks some more, tries to get out of her bed and everything. We found it is easier to swat her and sit in the bedroom until she goes to sleep.
12-10-2008, 04:10 PM
A lot of it is normal two year old behavior- but a lot of it is the lack of sleep. Try and make the room very dark, and take out the toys. Then I would say lock her in until she falls asleep. Once she gets back into a rhythm, it should get better.
12-15-2008, 12:21 PM
I have a 2 year old who was independent from the start... She Tried the whole MY WAY OR I'LL THROW MYSELF ON THE GOUND AND SCREAM Crap with me... Which doenst fly in my book...
She Throws stuff, beats up other kids, screams "MINE", and Tries to Tell me "no" constantly...
I found that several things make a melt down much easier...
"BRING BACKUP" ~ It is so embarrassing and frustrating to be by yourself trying to get shopping or something done when you have to stop every 5 seconds to get her to put something back or stop destroying things... I love bringing my boyfriend as backup... we take turns putting things back and explaining to her that shes not getting it... If theres a melt down then either One of us can walk off with her around the store and let her lead us up and down the isles... or in extreme cases sit in the car till the other is done...
"DONT LET THEM INSIDE YOUR HEAD"~I know it sucks having people stare at you when she acts up... but feeling the eyes on you and showing that you realize they are there starts a whole other problem... you getting upset along with your kid and your kid getting an audience... when you get flustered it makes calming your kid down 100x worse... also when toddlers get attention for doing dramatic acts and acting out they will start doing it WAY More...
"CHOICES" ~ On all the little things... everyday I pick out 2 outfits that not only match but match eachother for her to chose from... that way if she likes one shirt but not the pants you dont have a melt down over that... Food is a big thing too... I let her tell me when she's hungry and ask if she wants one food or another... simple stuff like Waffles or Eggs, or Banana's or Grapes... makes the day go so much faster if you dont spend half of it fighting and the other cleaning up after the tantrum distruction...
"DONT FORCE IT" ~ If she does something wrong let her know... but dont yell over it... Example: Paige hits her Daddy thinking its funny... He ignores her 5 mins later when she wants uppy... He tells her he didnt think it was very funny and that he doesnt think she should get picked up untill she appologies to him... she agrees usually and says sorry and they move on and she doesnt do it for a while again because she doesnt want daddy to ignore her again... My mom tries to force appologies from her right away when she hits the puppy too ruff or hits someone... This usually ends with more screaming and one really upset toddler who two minutes later does the same thing... thinking all she has to do is have another fit and say sorrys that dont mean anything before going one again...
Just a few things that really help me out with getting throught the day with my terror toddler and me being pregnant and outta energy... hope it helps...
12-20-2008, 11:15 AM
If she is saying no alot it may be her way of saying yes since they hear that word alot her nastyness could be because your not understanding that no may mean yes to her so if she say's to give granny a kiss then bring her close to ganny and if she backs away then i means she means no
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