View Full Version : At my witts end...
03-15-2008, 03:27 PM
I have 2 girls ages 2 years and 1 year. Lately I have had MAJOR battles over sleep with them. They go to bed at a reasonable 7:30-8:00 pm every night and they SCREAM at the top of their lungs for hours!! (Last night we went for 5 hours non stop). they are dry, fed, read to, bathed, etc. They have all the creature comforts and yet they freak out. Does anybody have any sanity saving tips? I am really at a loss. They sleep in separate rooms. Nothing that we have done works. We comfort, caddle, sing, turn on lights...nothing we are doing is working and it's taking a toll on us and our marriage. Please help us!!
03-15-2008, 07:50 PM
I don't know how adamant you are about the girls falling asleep in their rooms but the my girls lay on the couch with their blankets covering them. I turn off all the lights but one and play some soft music. After they fall asleep, I carry them to their crib and they are fine. I've tried to get them to fall asleep in their room but it is TERRIBLE! So I figure as long as they are sleeping then it is fine with me.
03-16-2008, 12:32 AM
You might also try putting them to bed earlier. 7:30-8pm sounds a little late for a 1 yr old. I think 6:30-7pm is better. It's kind of counterintuitive that an earlier bedtime helps sleep the rest of the night but it works for my 2 year old. Also... try to really calm things down from the late afternoon through dinner and bath. No loud music or really wild play.
04-04-2008, 11:59 AM
My 18mo old is in bed by 7:30 and has been for quite some time so I don't think that is too late a bedtime. She sleeps from 7:30p-7a and has since she was 2mo old (with trials here and there of course). My husband and I knew we never wanted this situation so it was one of our top concerns when we brought home our bundle of joy.
If you ever watch Super Nanny you'll know that this is a very common battle for parents. And we have always done the same thing she instructs. We have a routine at bedtime and we follow it every night (bath, pj's, brush teeth, go say night night to all her play things, give kisses to everyone including the dogs, storytime, bedtime). We refuse to jump through hoops for her unless she is ill and really needs us. Bedtime is bedtime. Sometimes she will fall asleep during storytime (which is in a rocking chair in her room, very quiet environment for her to unwind in), but other times she is wide awake when we put her in her crib. Sometimes she falls right to sleep (usually) and sometimes she wants to make a big production out of it and cry for a bit. We let her cry, and there were times early on when she REALLY threw everything she had into her fits. We always stuck to our guns. Go through the checklist (fed, changed, read to, etc) and then stick to your guns. It may sound harsh, but it really works. She definitely had her troubles sleeping in her own crib alone, but we started at 2mo and have never looked back. It is good for her, it's good for us. And it isn't their place to know they need their sleep - they are too young to know that. We are the parents and we are the ones that know what's best for them and that is a good nights sleep every night.
Super Nanny always instructs the same thing. Go through the established bed time routine. If they get out of bed or scream, you put them back or console them the first time. The second time and all subsequent times, you put them back in bed without a single word; no payoff whatsoever. With my daugther, I can't even go back in her room to console. The mere act of seeing me sends her over the edge. As hard as it is, I have had to learn her real threshold and I don't back in her room unless I know she has reached that threshold and really can't calm herself back down without help.
We also have white noise; a fan runs in her room whenever she is sleeping to help drown out any outside noise.
Are they getting good naps during the day? We have found that not only do we need a consistent night time routine, but that goes hand in hand with a good daytime nap routine as well. If she is past just being tired at night, we will put her to bed a bit earlier. Never do we put her to bed past her bedtime at 7:30.
04-09-2008, 10:18 AM
Have you ever thought about having the girls share a room? My nephews went through something similar and then once they were in the same room they seemed to be comforted by the other being there. If you have tried everything else why not give it a shot? If your 2 year old is in a bed or even a toddler bed try moving that into the 1 year olds room. And maybe try playing so soft music. My little girl goes to bed every night listening to lulabyes and has since I brought her home from the hospital.
Have you tried a sound machine? It seemed to sooth my kids. Also, the idea of sharing a room may help, as long as they don't excite each other. Also, be sure to keep the bedtime routine consistent, even on the weekends, at this age. Good luck!
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