Christmas present concerns...

[chart11]

Our daughter will be 14 months at Christmas time. She just had a big first birthday with lots of gifts. We have also always had a problem with my husband's family buying too many or inappropriate gifts. I want to have family buy gifts from the Salvation Army trees this year in lieu of presents for my daughter. Needy kids will have a better Christmas and our daughter will not get more things she doesn't need/play with. My husband is against this. Any ideas on how to convince him and how to tell family without any "hurt feelings"? (although they shouldn't be hurt, it's for a good cause!) Any input would be greatly appreciated! Thanks!

[craftyashley]

The twins always get a hoard of presents from Christmas, and their birthday in January. We let them open a few age-appropriate ones, the others go in the toy closet to be opened on a day when mommy needs a break or when they are old enough to enjoy them. It has been so nice! Especially, at that age, their abilities evolve so fast! We also rotate the toy bins so that they don't get bored and ignore perfectly good toys.

I like the idea of donating. But I would do it when your child can also learn something from it. I plan on asking the girls for one of their birthdays if we could do a donation for needy kids who don't get any toys- (I'd write it in the invitation that the toys will be donated) But I want my kids to make the decision and feel good about doing something for less-fortunate kids as well as learn to be grateful for all the things they do have.

[MommaC]

Sometimes posing it as a question can be more effective than issuing a mandate. "I was just thinking that Sally has received SOOOO many toys this year already. What would you all think of blessing others through the Salvation Army tree instead of buying her even MORE gifts?" However, questions CAN backfire. They may all tell you exactly what they think, and it's possible NO ONE will like the idea. If things don't go your way, you could always receive the gifts they give...and then DONATE whatever toys seriously don't fit in her toy box. Too many toys are too many toys. If anyone gives you a bad time, you don't have to feel guilty--you warned them that she has too many toys! Best of luck to you :)

[mtnmama1]

We rotate toys so that only 1/3 of her toys are out at any given time. When the time comes to get rid of things, I take the stuff that's off rotation and give it away. This has two benefits, one, she doesn't realize the stuff is missing permanently and two, neither do my ILs when they wonder what happened to one of the fifty bazillion toys they bought her. Just a thought.

Another possibility if they want to give her gifts for Christmas is to ask them to get things that are age appropriate for an 18-20 month old and then set those toys away until she's ready for them. There are big developmental difference between 1 and 1 1/2 and your daughter already has plenty of toys for her current phase but there isn't going to be a gift giving holiday when she's moving out of that phase.

[lena241]

Good luck with this. My 1st Christmas with my DH and my in-laws, I asked that in place of my gift (I didnt need anything) that they donate whatever funds to a charity of thier choice. My Dh wouldnt even present this idea to them and stated that this is not how Christmas happened in thier family. To this day, My DD and I receive many gifts at Christmas that I dont feel are necessary. Unfortunatly, to keep the peace, I have had to accept being the reciepient of too many gifts. As a result, my DH and I agreed that we would minimize the number of gifts that we (Mom and Dad) and Santa give to my DD. With the extra funds, we will take a name from the tree and church and spend our money on charity. My in-laws and none the wiser and we still come out with a minimal number of gifts.

Santa gives 1-2 gifts and we give 1-2 gifts.

Good Luck
Amanda

[fiery]

I wouldn't feel bad mentioning it. Though kind of put it like this. _____ her father and I would really love for everyone to do ________ instead of gifts this year. If you really feel that you must get her something here are some of the things she really likes. Suggest books, gift certificates for classes like art, tumbling, ect or DVDs of shows like wonderpets, Dora, Barney, Wiggles ect. You could also ask peope instead of gifts to make plans to spend a day with your daughter or go somewhere special with her like the Zoo or park. I was able to get my sister to take my 13mos od shopping for christmas gifts for toys for tots. She let my daughter pick out the toys she wanted to give and pay for them then they put them in the box and took pictures of her doing it so she will have that memory.


If you can't avoid gifts then after she opens them put them away and donate them after the holidays.


As for my own gifts to my daughter and Santa gifts we do 3 gifts from mom because that is what Jesus recieved as she gets older one will be a spiritual gift. and Santa is doing "something she wants, something she needs, something to wear, and something to read." Most of the gifts I got are second hand from the consignment shop. a better price and a good way to help the enviroment.


I defiantely hear you on all the clothes and toys. my daughter is the same age as yours and even though she got almost all clothes for her birthday she as far more then she needs. She can go nearly a month without wearing the same outfit twice.

[JoshDennis]

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[veronica4x4]

just say mabe just say i think thoes toy should mabe go to the needy kids don't you i mean well they need it a little more then she does