MIL trouble

[tierrajo1]

I have written another thread about trouble with my in laws. Since then we have kind of backed away from them, we still see them just not as much as before. Well, the other day my MIL unexpectadly dropped by. She "nicely" offered to help pick up. Yesterday when I went to get my birth control, it was missing. It was in the kitchen, where she was cleaning, and now I can not find it. She does not approve of birth control, because she thinks it is a mortal sin and interefere's with god's will. I have three children three and under, I just went on it, my husband and I came to this decision together and agreed not to discuss it with his family because we knew she would not like it. I have gotten comments from her about us having another child soon and have tried to explain to her that I need a break. I do not know how to handle this situation, I can not prove that she took it but it is pretty coincidental and something I would not put pass her. If she did I feel like I do not want her in my home anymore but I do not know how to approach this. Any advice?

[charliesmommy]

I'd ask her if she remembers where she put your birth control and take it from there.

[tierrajo1]

I know I need to say something I just know she is going to use it as an oppurtunity to rant at me about what a horrible person I am for using it in the first place.

[charliesmommy]

So then you ask her why it is not OK for you to take birth control but OK for her to teach your daughter to hate men.
It's none of her business if you decide to take birth control and it's about time you stand up and tell her just that. You don't have to be mean. Just simply state very calmly that it is not her decision and that you would appreciate her keeping her opinions on it to herself. If you're calm about it and not whiney or bitchy, she'll more than likely take you seriously and lay off.

[brandie1127]

When I lived at my inlaws my father in law "accidentally" threw out my engagement ring while cleaning - I had taken it off while cooking. We looked everywhere for it and found it in the garbage rolled in a napkin and stuffed in a macaronni box! No kidding!
Not that you owe her an explanation but maybe you should tell her that YOUR beliefs are in being a fully functional home to the children you already have. Having too many children can be considered neglectful. Kids are expensive, time consuming and need all of your patience. KUDOS to you for even going past two! Then theres the "other"approach. You know the one your teenage daughter might eventually try to use ... complain to her about aweful cramping, bleeding, mood swings, lethargy, cysts anything you can think of. Tell her it is making life very difficult in your house because you can't be a fully functional mom. "You're dr. prescribed you medicine to take care of this "medical condition" but you just can't seem to find them ... and you NEED them to function. Does she know where this "medicine" is? Tell her while you are "suffering" from "this condition" the doctor has recommended that you wait to add to your family. Hopefully that'll help! God bless your patience and I thought my MIL was bad.

[aidie24]

First of all, that is a very sticky situation. It really stinks that your MIL thinks she has the right to have any say in your personal life with your spouse. I would ask her if she saw it while she was cleaning up and ask her where she put it. But, if you don't want the confrontation, most insurance companies will do a once a year over ride to get your refill on your BCP's early. You can call them, explain the situation and get them to over ride the high co-pay to fill early. Or you can explain it to your pharmacy and they can call your insurance. Just a thought, although you should probably address it with your MIL, medication in any form is not cheap, and weather she agrees with it or not, unless she's going to pay for it, she needs to keep her mitts off. BC is a personal choice between you and your spouse and she needs to keep her beliefs out of it. Your body and your patience need a break!

[charliesmommy]

Then theres the "other"approach. You know the one your teenage daughter might eventually try to use ... complain to her about aweful cramping, bleeding, mood swings, lethargy, cysts anything you can think of. Tell her it is making life very difficult in your house because you can't be a fully functional mom. "You're dr. prescribed you medicine to take care of this "medical condition" but you just can't seem to find them ... and you NEED them to function. Does she know where this "medicine" is? Tell her while you are "suffering" from "this condition" the doctor has recommended that you wait to add to your family. Hopefully that'll help! God bless your patience and I thought my MIL was bad.

This is GREAT advice!!! I absolutley love it and OMG...LOL!