I dont know how to deal plz help

[Angelmom87]

Hi I dont post often but i need to talk to someone anyone who may understand. On july 11 2009 i gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, she was 1 1/2 months early. I named her Elika, she was born with a cleft lip & palet 2 holes in her heart and a genetic disorder called trisomy 13. I went up to her every day and touched her and talked to her. at first they didnt know what was wrong with her and ran a lot of tests all they could tell me was that she was blind and severly retarded. a week later i was told that she had trisomy 13 and that only one baby had ever made it to adulthood and he was a vegitable all his life. Faced with the decition to either keep my baby hooked to tubes the rest of her life or let her go i chose to le her go. She was alive for 2 weeks she died on july 24 2009. I havent been the same since and my 2 year old son can tell, im never happy anymore and the meds given to me no longer work. i cant seem to pull myself out of this rut but maybe it would help if i knew i did the right thing for her.

[amandalburris]

I am so very sorry for your loss. I can't imagine the heartbreak you are dealing with. The only thing I know is that your other child needs you. Please seek counseling along with medication you are receiving. Your loss is real and it should be dealt with at your pace. You did what was best for your daughter she is watching over you from a better place.

[Angelmom87]

thank you i am trying to keep going for my son, i just miss her alot.

[momof5plus1]

u grieve until u heal which takes longer with a child.did u talk with the clergy in the hospital before making your decision? i know some hospitals have support groups.i get the feeling you seem to feel like you need permission for your decision,does that make sense? you really need your family,and therapy can help you move pass the pain.you really should'nt feel guilty,you made a decision that no mother should have to make.
do i think you made the right choice,if i was in your situation,yes i would.for you see,i hav 6,3 are small and they need their mommy.please get help,i will pray for your peice of mind,i wish you the best,tammy