View Full Version : but he wants a bottle
12-26-2009, 12:24 AM
This is my 3rd time around breastfeeding and now at 15 weeks he has about 1 2oz bottle every other day. So I feel I am doing GREAT, especially since I feed 90% on only one side. I know when he needs the bottle when he starts getting really fussy while trying to nurse and quickly pulling off and on. Trust me I tried diapers, burping, ect ect. He is sooo happy after the bottle. My husband thinks he feeds every 2-3 hours during the day then by 7pm he is so hungry he demands the bottle-since its mostly the same time every night.
It sooo does not help my dh thinks I need to "give it up" and just start formula full time.
Of course I am discouraged, but mostly just dont know what to do. There is no pumping-my pump gets nothing out of me, not even 1 oz after 24 hours of pumping. So I cant increase by that method. And the every 2-3 hours at this stage (15 wks) is wearing me very thin, not to mention making doing anything impossible.
I want to reach my goal of 6 months at least, now that seems sooooo far away.
12-26-2009, 11:50 AM
You could do both, continue to breastfeed and give formula. Also, I had a hard time with pumping so what I did pump I combined with formula. So what you could do is alternate breast and formula. At the times that you give formula go ahead and pump out what you can to mix with the next bottle of formula. This way you can still breastfeed and get a break. To me it's like getting your cake and eating it too. Good luck, I am sure everything will work out just fine.
12-30-2009, 01:25 PM
Here are a few ways to increase milk production.
Take the herbal supplement fenugreek. The research I did shows that it is harmless to mom and baby (if you are diabetic, ask your doctor). Fenugreek is actually used to make the fake flavoring of some Maple Syrup candy! Some women see results within 24 hours of taking the herb. The maximum dose is 3 pills, 3 times a day (that is around 900mg 3times a day). But the rule of thumb is to start with 1-2 pills 3 times a day and increase if you are not noticing a result. You know you are taking enough if you (and maybe baby) begin to smell like maple syrup. Most women only need to take it 1 week or less, and as long a baby continues to suckle, production should remain up. (google Fenugreek to get more info - it can be found in most grocery store pharmacies)
The other way is to have a day in bed with baby. (I'd do this along with taking fenugreek) It takes about 24 hours to increase milk supply. So you and baby just stay in bed, with him next to you and encourage him to take the breast often. The more he suckles the more you will increase. Yes, you will get nothing done that day, but one day of doing nothing may solve your dilemma. If you just can't do it, then simply take time out of the day every hour and have him nurse (for one day, after doing this for one day you should be able to go back to a normal schedule and still have an increased production)
Also, most babies are cranky in the evenings anyways - so maybe it is not that he needs a bottle, but a bottle is much easier to drink from, so since it is offered he will give up on the breast and take it/demand it.
You really need your husband's support in this. Breastfeeding is so beneficial to both mom and baby and formula cannot compare in some areas. Ask your hospital and OB office if they have a lactation consultant for you to visit. Bring your husband, the consultant may be able to help him see how he should support you.
How long does your baby suckle for? My baby would be at the breast for 45-90 minutes for one feeding, and fed every 3-4 hours. I started doing breast compressions and then after 45 minutes of feeding give him a pacifier. He started to become a more efficient eater, although he began to eat every 2-3 hours. By the time he was 5 months old he ate in less than 10 minutes every 3 hours.
And why do you feed on only one side? If you do the day in bed thing, then spend a lot of time on the side you ignore. That should help to increase it's production, which would help to increase flow of milk, which may help your baby to like using it more, which would give you both breasts to work with.
Dr. Jack Newman ( http://www.nbci.ca/ ) is who my lactation consultant from the hospital gets most of her information from. You can actually e-mail their clinic directly if you can't find answers on the website. They have good and helpful information, as well as info on the benefits of breastfeeding, which may help your husband. Good luck and I hope you can keep at it as long you desire.
12-30-2009, 01:30 PM
One more thing, different pumps work differently on different people. See if you can try out some others. Also, the flange of the pump may be too big or too small, you can usually purchase different flange sizes. Here is an article on that http://www.medelabreastfeedingus.com/tips-and-solutions/13/choosing-a-correctly-fitted-breastshield
01-01-2010, 02:59 AM
I will try the Fenugreek soon. Next week I will be renting a pump(hospital grade) so I can return to work for 3 weeks. Then I can use it to help increase as well. I may use my bad side for pumping-then can give him that bottle at the end of every day.
I only feed on one side since I had a lumpectomy a few years ago, the scar tissue makes it very very difficult for him to get any milk-and even then only a few drops come out at a time. I feed him only that side for about 3 min twice a day just to keep things flowing.
I only wish I could do the daybed idea. I have 2 other children that I must care for and not to mention I have to work. But for now things are going ok, just frustrating that every night between 7-10 he will eat, then get mad, then take a 2 oz bottle.
My husband is supporting in that he brings me the baby, but not many other ways for breastfeeding. HAHA I did convince him that I night all I do is roll over-thats it, if wants to give our baby a bottle he can get up-make it, feed it to him, burp him, then put him back to sleep. I got his support real quick after that!
01-01-2010, 05:30 PM
Newmom! gave you lots of great info already. A few more thoughts: His "wanting" a bottle sounds like nipple confusion. Here are some links on that and how to avoid it:
My baby nursed almost constantly at that age. The only way I could get anything done was to nurse with a baby carrier, so I could walk around and had at least one hand free to get stuff done. She once nursed straight through an entire grocery shopping trip. I think the Moby brand is most comfortable, but there are various styles you could try.
Fenugreek also makes a tasty tea. My husband drinks it now just for the flavor. It's cheapest in Indian groceries, where it's usually called methi.
You're managing to feed your baby your breastmilk almost exclusively, and your husband wants you to "give it up"? Sheesh. I can think of lots of snide responses to that kind of negativity, but they wouldn't help.
02-05-2010, 10:10 PM
I am bumping my own post since I still have the same problem at 5mos only worse. He only nurses for a few min at a time. Then after several hours is starving and wont nurse and needs a bottle. Also he dropped to 20% on weight from 50%. I know I have milk, but doesnt want to nurse. Is he self weaning?
02-07-2010, 01:19 AM
I was going to give you some advice, but the ladies on here gave you excellent advice. So, I'll just tell you good luck!
02-07-2010, 11:37 PM
Is the hospital-grade pump working for you? If he's not willing to nurse right now, you'll have to do something to keep your supply up. Or if pumps don't work for you, have you tried hand-expressing?
Have you tried a supplemental nursing system? I haven't tried it myself, but there's lots of info if you google it. That could help with his nipple confusion, and also stimulate your breast to make more milk even as he's drinking formula.
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