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MommyToConnor
11-07-2009, 09:47 AM
*I also posted this up in Common Baby Concerns*

My 13 month old son, Connor, was diagnosed with having a developmental delay. When he was initally evaluated at 11 months, he had the gross motor range of a 7-8 month old. We were told at that time not to get him physical therapy. A few doctor's appointments later, our doctor reccommended physical therapy. He's only had two sessions, but our physical therapist suggested activities to help his weak core muscles. However, I try to do the excercises with Connor and he absolutly objects. Whenever he doesn't have his way, he'll arch his whole back and neck and hysterically cry. There was also the possible Failure To Thrive diagnosis thrown around since he also lost five pounds starting when he was three months old. Our first doctor never suspected Failure To Thrive. Our second opinion and current doctor said it was a possible explanation to the weight loss and gross motor delay. However, she told my husband and I that she has since ruled it out after adjusting his diet. Then she sent this program in my state that we go through called Help Me Grow (in case no one has heard of it, someone comes to your home free of charge to inform you of how your child should be developing and evaluate your child if a delay is suspected) a letter stating that Connor was definatly diagnosed with Failure To Thrive. The doctor said months ago that this was ruled out and she sent this fax to Help Me Grow in October! This just happened.

Basically, I have no idea where to go from here. I tried to talk to the doctor about this, but I had to make a specific appointment just for that, which is on the 16th of this month. I'm trying to get a second opinion, but our insurance just isn't working with us. Connor is in physical therapy now, but he just seems to be getting more behind as he gets older. I am so confused and worried about my son's health. I am trying to stay strong, but how can I when I'm convinced that it's all my fault? Could this be my fault? Has anyone here gone through any of this? Please reply. I need all the advice I can get.

MommyToConnor
11-07-2009, 12:22 PM
Seriously, over 50 people have looked at this thread and not a single reply. I just want to know how to help my son and I want advice, possibly (but not exclusivly) from other parents who have a child with a developmental delay or Failure To Thrive.

The Loud
11-07-2009, 01:26 PM
I wish I could be more helpful, but I don't have any direct experience in this (except for having been a failure-to-thrive baby myself, and I don't remember any helpful pointers from that time.) I googled "failure to thrive" and as I read it, it just means that a baby isn't growing as much as expected, or suddenly loses weight. It doesn't say anything about the reason the baby isn't growing. A baby could fail to thrive for a whole lot of different reasons. If your baby suddenly lost 5 pounds, that seems to me to exactly fit the definition of "failure to thrive."

Your current doctor seems better than the last one, thank goodness, but maybe she doesn't have the whole story, which explains her confusion over whether to use the "failure to thrive" diagnosis or not. FTT is usually caused by some subtle, hard-to-understand health problem, like an allergy. Maybe she was looking for some subtle, tricky problem. In your son's case, judging from your earlier posts, it's clear that he lost all that weight because of a very clear, simple cause: your doctor told you you had to feed him less. Your new doctor probably can't believe that your old doctor would have said something so stupid. That old doctor should have known that a baby suddenly losing 5 pounds was a problem. He didn't even recognize failure to thrive.

If I were you, I'd be talking with lawyers about a medical malpractice lawsuit against your old doctor.