insurance and TTC.. ? Long (sorry :) )

[m.sorcic@yahoo.com]

Ok here is the sticky situation we are in. Please tell me what you think.
My fiance and I have been together for 10years getting married in Dec., I am 24 and currently still finishing grad school. We have decided that we want to start our family while we are living out of state away from our home town to give ourselves privacy (and yes we know this mean little/no help) the first time around. So here is my question. He works a full time job and carries private insurance, I also have insurance but NO maternity coverage. Because I don't have an "income" someone suggested I try to apply for Medicaid instead of waiting the year to TTC and pay an outrageous premium for 80/20 coverage through private pay. WDYT? It feels wrong to go on medicaid when we feel we have the means to support a child. I think we would qualify but I just can't bring myself to accept the help even though this will prob be the only time in our lives we will fall in the right "income-need" category..?? Its appealing bc its covered 100% and if we qualify-why does it feel so wrong taking it?

Also, f's granpa recently fell really ill and we both agree that starting a family sooner than later is what we want so his grandpa can meet the baby (if we could get preg right away) Is it irresponsible to start trying a month before the wedding?? Seriously you can give it to me straight because we will ultimately make our own decision anyway just want some things to ponder, Anyone familiar with Medicaid? Will it affect us financially/credit wise in the future?
Thanks!!

[kare.bear]

I absolutely think it's wrong to expect me to pay for your maternity leave when I didn't have anyone pay for mine! I don't get maternity leave through work, but I didn't ask the government (i.e. my neighbors) to pay for my leave! I paid for Short Term Disability in advance of getting pregnant so I had at least 60% coverage for the time I was home. Don't PLAN for a child if you KNOW you can't make ends meet.

I understand accidents and I understand hardship. That's not what you are talking about. You are actually planning on relying on me and other taxpayers to pay your bill just because it's convenient and easier. I find that unethical. I have trouble meeting all my obligations some months, but I'm not asking for a handout to get bills paid. We make choices and prioritize and do the best we can. Don't take advantage of the rest of us just because you have an arbitrary timeline in your head. Think ahead and be responsible. That's part and parcel of being a good parent.

[PalmettoLady]

Hmmm.... Instead of going the Medicaid route (which I also thinks wrong), find out if you furture Dh's insurance will pay maternity. Most company sponsored employee policies do, right after your wedding have him add you to his, weddings qualify as an event to open enrollment for him to change his policy. Do NOT let your insurance lapse until you are on his plan, maternity then SHOULD have no or a small waiting time.

We are going to TTC in June/July 2010, so I am in the middle of getting our insurance all hammered out too.

[coma1105]

Get medicaid...I wouldnt want to pay 30,000 bucks...

And Kare-Bear...would you rather your tax dollars go to new baby be born or to all those teen mommies...or maybe to a crack head needing to go to rehab to stay out of jail? Just to start up again...because that's where they are going.

[taraken]

I agree completely with Kare.bear!!!!!!! I think that is irresponsible and wrong to go on Medicare when you have the means to take care of a child. Plus if DH has health insurance wait to get preggo until you get married. Chances are...a few months isn't going to change anything with grandpa.

Coma~ when people defend things like this is just ticks me off. As a person with a good paying job who pays a ridiculous amount of money in taxes, I have never gotten help from our gov't. I hate that my money is going to people who use the system. I think rather than that arse Obama changing health care...he should change welfare. Make it workfare...with the money the gov't can save by changing the system and getting people to work for that money, they could subsidized health care for low income families instead of giving it to people who are to lazy or selfish to work. The more people who take advantage of the system...the less people who actually deserve and need help will get it. AKA our seniors. Also...there is no need someone to have a baby when they do not have the means to provide for it. Wait until you are ready financially. I know they say you are never ready...but there is a a defined line between ready...and completely being irresponsible.

[allisonb]

I completely agree with kare.bear. You would be essentially cheating the system and taking our money for your selfishness.

[coma1105]

I think that health care should be free to everyone. I think it's bull**** that our country doesn't have free health care and yet we are the "best" country. And about your idea of workfare...that's what it is. Once your child turns one you have to start a program called Community Jobs and they place you in a good job to work for your money. I did that and now I have a full time job. I agree that some people abuse the system and it really pisses me off...but I get free health care from the state because I need it and don't make enough money to pay for health insurance. My son gets free health coverage until he is 19. But my husband doesn't have anything. Places like Canada and France have 100% full coverage for EVERYONE in their country. Maybe if we had voted Clinton this past election, we would have it too.

[taraken]

Coma, I agree...some people do more of a workfare program..but not everyone because of the abuses in the system. There are way to many loop holes and I commend you for working hard. But that is not the case in many situations. I have a family member who has never worked a day in her life and gets checks and health insurance and the best doctors in the country. She actually had a second child when her kid was 16 so she could continue to live off the system. She also lives with her "husband" finance of 6 years because they won't get married so she can get a check....and wears a 1 carat diamond ring. So who says that there isn't welfare still and only workfare is kidding themselves.

I agree I wish health care was free for everyone. But the plan Obama has brought up is not doable. I already pay $500 a month between DH and I to get insurance...yes it is good insurance...but there is also tons of co-pays etc. If his plan goes through the company I work for will probably be taxed even more for providing this option (which I am paying for) and drop it. I have no problem with people being on medicare/medicade if you need it. For example your son...but to plan a family and go on medicare by using loop holes so you can not have to pay for fertility when someone like me who pays for the medicare needed to pay cash is not right.

I don't know that Clinton's plan would be any better. I think the best way to fix the system is to cut all these ridiculous lawsuits. That would allow doctors to pay less for liability insurance. Then the cost of medical care would be reduced dramatically and maybe insurance costs would be more reasonable.

[taraken]

Ki~ Medicaid is a health program for individuals and families with low incomes and resources. Medicare is a social insurance program that provides health insurance to people age 65 or older, people under age 65 with certain disabilities. The problem is that they are often not used as they were intended. Basically there are a lot of loop holes. Like what this person is suggesting. She has the income and ability to buy insurance and is getting married soon. But if she doesn't wait to get pregnant...she could possibly get medicaid. While she and her finance are able to afford insurance, she is asking if it is wrong to use the loop holes to save herself money. If medicare & medicaid were used correctly they wouldn't be in such bad condition. It is funded through taxes...and many of the seniors have awful coverage. Personally I think the money should go to those people who have worked and input money into the system then so many people who live together and don't get married so they & their children can get insurance through the gvt. It happens all the time and is one of the reasons why there is such a focus right now on national health insurance run by the govt. Many people don't like the idea right now because the way the bill is written. For example...the company I work for subsidized my health insurance..same with hubbies. We pay about $500 a month for health insurance & life insurance. Which is a lot of money....but it is above average insurance. For example having a baby start to finish will cost me about $500. If the plan Obama is proposing goes through..my company will be taxed on providing me a Cadillac plan. (Even though it is still super expensive to me..my company pays a ton for it.) If my company stops providing insurance it will be taxed. So basically it will end up providing me a mediocre plan to help bottom line financial and allow it to continue to be competitive in an international economy. People don't understand this. It could put many more businesses out of business because of the impacts and it "takes away part of my compensation". Many people who have not read or gotten educated on it think it is just free health insurance for everyone. It just isn't that simple. Someone has to pay for it. I think more rules (like workfare...which Coma participated in) should be required. Loop holes should be harder to get. They should check who is living in a household and if their are two parents of a child....treat them as married from a medicare perspective...etc.

[taraken]

Ki~ Exactly. If this stuff was used properly by all it would be great. But when people use loop holes to screw the system it just ticks me off. There are a lot of people who really do need help and I don't mind paying taxes to help others. I actually donate a big chunk every year and decrease my taxable income so that I can give it to people and organizations that I think are using my money effectively and for good things. Since that is legal (I am an accountant) and it makes me feel good..even though it is not a 1/1 help to my financial situation it makes me feel good. AKA I donate a lot to seniors, veterans, and children support organizations.

[taraken]

Ki~ That is tough your friend and really awful. That was my comment about how people abusing the system like what this person is proposing is hurting the system so it can't support people like your friend who really, truly needs help. Has he tried to get Cobra. Usually you can get that in between jobs for x amount of time. With his pre-existing condition it is going to be hard to get private insurance. Don't get me wrong, I think they should try to get some kind of health care option for all Americans. I just don't know that free is the way to go, since it needs to be funded somehow. I do know that what is being proposed could severely hurt big business in America, which is not what the economy needs right now. I am not against a system like Canada's. But our gvt isn't efficient or effective enough to put this into place. Anyone that has read the bills our congressmen/women put in would probably be shocked by how many things from their personal agendas get slipped into completely unrelated bills. There is tooo much bargaining, politics etc. If our gvt and universities were run the way our businesses were in america we would be a much more successful country.

[Kimberlylah]

I feel your pain. I have a 5 year old and we are now talking about another soon. I had a feeling i needed to call my insurance company and ask about my maternity insurance.. dumb ol' me.. I didn't realize that my private insurance through my work didn't have maternity on it. I have had it for 4 years. I cant get on my husbands insurance until 2012 in open enrollment and if i add it to my insurance i will pay 125 more dollars a month than i do now and it only pays for 60%. Like i have that to put in along with all the expenses to pay for a newborn.. so we are going to make the right decision and wait. I think you should too.